random feelings

IM SO SORRY

nobody really knows the meaning of pain unless they deal with it. there many different types of pain: relationship pain, friendship pain, family pain, ect. ive been through pain, ive put people through pain but there are people who dont deservse the pain at all because they might already be going through something on a daily basis.

 I did just that a couple days ago, i have hurt the person i promised i said i never would hurt, but i did anyway. i hurt her by taking out my anger and pain i had inside, but she didnt need that.. i would understand if she never wanted to talk to me again for what i did, its just sometimes you never know what that person goes through on a daily basis. and i want her to know that im sorry for doing that to her, i know she might not take my apology and i desvere that honestly i do.. it wasnt her fault for what happened, i need her to know that she was right, that i should have never spoken to the person she didnt want me to talk to, because just maybe, maybe i would still have her.

its never right to take your anger out on people that dont desvere it, never put people in between yours and someone else's problems, you and that other person your having problems with need to keep it between you both.

i know this will not change the pain i have caused but now i know that i cant take my pain out on her no matter what so if she reads this.. this is for you.

dear, baby

i know that i caused you pain and i know i should have not taken it out on you like i did, you didnt desvere that, im sorry i broke my promise to you and him, but you were right i shouldve never ever talked to him the way i did..and i know that you might not ever talk to me again and i would understand.. i dont desvere you but remember that i will always love you and that you are my baby girl and im hoping that you will talk to me again.. but if you dont i will hope maybe down the road you will come back to me. I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH and im SORRY FOR EVERYTHING and now i wish i could wake up with amnesia, then to have lost you

-yours truly brittany

everyone learns from their mistakes and i know i definently did with mine because i lost a very good friend/sister/my main girl.  I hoping that she will let me tell her happy birthday tomorrow..