troubled ✗ jjk

i'm scared

I was sitting on the couch as I tried my best to ignore my parents fighting upstairs.

This was typical for a Friday night: me feeling lonely, my parents fighting, and my brother no where to be found.

I opened tumblr and scrolled past all the photos of perfect couples and families.

Enough of that.

I walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge, grabbing the bag of ripe purple grapes.

I've been watching my eating for the past year and lately I've been starting to starve myself. Some days, I don't even eat, I just binge on water.

Today I was treating myself to grapes.

I was about to put the bag away when I heard a thud from the living room. I looked around the corner and found my brother by the door.

"Jungkook! What are you doing? You scared me!" I said, scolding him.

"Will you be quiet! I'm leaving." He said, getting on his coat.

"Aish, You know you're grounded!" I reminded him.

"And you think I care? Just do me a favor and don't tell mom or dad." He said and gave me a kiss on the forehead and caressed my cheek before storming off.

"But what if they check your room and you aren't there?"

"They won't, stop worrying. I won't be long."

He left the house and went to his car, opened the door and took off down the street, leaving me all alone.

My brother and I have always been close, especially lately when we have to be around of parents' problems.

He doesn't want to be around mom and dad... and neither do I.

Our parents are pretty scary, especially if alcohol is involved. We've tried to get help for them, but in the end it just makes them more angry.

Sometimes, leaving the house is the only escape from reality.

One day they're fighting, and the next they're locked in their room all day... And I don't want to know the details of that.

I sighed heavily and put my hair into a ponytail. I then walked upstairs and opened the door to my bedroom. I was about to walk in when my mother stormed into the hallway. She looked angry and her hair was a mess.

I tried my best to slip away before she could see me but it was too late.

"Jihye, where's your brother?"

Shit.

"Um I-I'm not sure."

She rolled her eyes and stomped down the stairs.

I went into my room and locked the door behind me.

I guess I'll find something to do in here.

-

I wasn't long until I heard a car door and looked out my window to see that Jungkook was home again.

I instantly felt relieved that I wouldn't be alone anymore.

As soon as he walked in the house, I heard hollering.

"Where have you been?!" My mother screamed.

"Jeon Jungkook!" My father boomed.

I was so scared for him as I listened my parents yell.

I couldn't take it, and within seconds I ran downstairs and stood beside my brother.

"Stop!" I yelled, getting everyone's attention for once.

"Excuse me, this doesn't concern you." My mother snickered.

I ignored what she said and continued talking.

"Don't you get why he leaves? It's because you, both of you! He doesn't want to be here and neither do I." 

Once I was done I grabbed Jungkook's arm and pulled him upstairs with me.

He was speechless.

We are both 19, but sometimes I act as if he's my younger brother. Sometimes he acts like I'm younger.

We both care for each other.

I pulled him in my room and slammed the door, hearing my parents voice's muffled through the wood.

"Are you alright?"

He didn't respond.

"Jungkook." I looked up at him and noticed his lip was bleeding.

"Omg what happened?" I grabbed a tissue and started dabbing his lip.

He was silent until a tear rolled down his cheek.

It takes a lot for Jungkook to cry.

"Dad?" I asked softly and he gave me a nod.

I embraced him in a tight hug and we were both silent, but our minds were talking.

Once we broke apart, I sat on my bed and so did he.

"I'm scared." I admitted in a whisper.

I was looking at the ground until Jungkook lifted my chin with his hand.

"Everything will be fine." He lifted me bridal style and laid me up near the top of my bed, before laying beside me.

I rested my head on his chest and he caressed my hair.

This made me feel safe.

His touch.

Jungkook's touch.

I never wanted to leave his arms.