white on white [sequel] ✔️

f i f t e e n

Waking up the next morning, I felt everything but regret.

On any other day, I would've been with Jc, Ricky and Lilly, having visited an underage club and gambled with fake money at the casino. I would've woken with a killer hangover and potential problems with a random hooker in my bed. It would take a mere ten minutes for the others to help me out and after we got the sleeping man out of our temporary home, it would be to the streets again and we'd be on the move.

But this wasn't the past and I had grown since my days running atop the trains. Now I was situated. At rest in a permanent home for once in nearly twelve years.

Thoughts wavered between two separate wholes of my life.

Last night proved all I need to know that making a normal life wouldn't be all that bad. Jenna, Mikey and Alexis were my family now and I would choose them with everything I have.

Tyler, Zoe, Blessing, Casper and Alfie were my close friends and I was anything but open to all their plans that were made.

Troye. Once I had found myself confused as to what we were and what our feelings stood for each other. But now I found myself edging closer to knowing than I had ever been before.

Whatever had happened in the past wasn't important because what we had now is something I could never let go of. He had shown me how I could love and I trusted him to hold onto what we had as much as I could.

My mind flipped back to my old gang mates. For so long they were the closest thing to family and I couldn't ever forget that. It's the least I could give them for all those years we spent together.

This was how I found myself at the entrance of Minnesota Correctional Facility at 10am- the facility in which I had been a patient what seemed like years ago.

Approaching the front desk, I was wary of the curious eyes of the passing nurses on their early rounds to the physiatrist ward. The receptionist behind the table was a young girl with tortoise shell glasses.

"Um.. I have a few..cousins in custody and I wanted to see them."

Her eyes flicked to the papers before her but quickly came back to mine.

"Visiting hours are from 3 to 6 so you'll need to come back later."

"No..look it's really important I see them."

"Sir I'm sorry but-"

"My name is Connor Franta. I was a patient here a few months ago and I highly suggest you let me in."

Her frown seemed to twitch and her eyes flashed with recognition as I found myself stifling a sigh of relief.

"I remember you! Here, I know how important friendships are here, Grace talks about it all the time and-oh! I'm getting distracted! Let me give you a security card that you can use on all the doors. Be wary please. I don't want to deal with a bad decision later.."

I nodded and thanked the woman quickly as she handed me a key card and I raced to the chamber of locked doors. A few security uniforms stood guard and I searched the eyes for a familiar face.

Dan saw me before I could check the tall form looming off to the side.

"C-Connor? What are you doing here..?"

"Dan!"

I was surprised to find myself bringing him into an embrace of thanks which he only returned slightly. I wasn't bothered, knowing his ways, and gave him a brief synopsis of my situation.

He agreed to take me in on one condition- I had to give a good apology to Phil for having beat him down my very first day at the yards.

I laughed and we made small talk as the elevator ascended to the fifth level.

"Onesies are the reason of world existence and if you disagree I can have you kicked out."

We continued with light conversation until I was standing in front of Jc's room. Number 3728.

As I entered the metal door, Dan gave me a reassuring look before blending back into the wall which seemed to be his speciality if I do say so myself.

The room was dim with the lone light of the single window illuminating the shadowed form sitting on the ledge of the glass. Jc's hair was buzzed short and a lone shackle remained around his ankle. I felt bad for him, having known his dislike for confinement.

Justin Caylen was free and he lived off his independence. This would change him.

"Didn't think you'd come."

I stirred as his eyes remained on the window but his face said he was only feeling guilt. He was always less emotional than any of us but to me, his emotions were blatant on his face.

"No brother left behind."

It was a saying we used to say to each other back when nights were filled with running and danger was nipping at our heels.

His face turned toward me and I knew he was hurting.

"Why?"

I looked down at my sneakers to catch my thoughts before replying with a low breath.

"We can't ignore what happened. I can't forget. But I'm not going to waste time holding a grudge against you when I know your reasoning was just as vulnerable as mine at the time. I want to move on and hopefully you do too."

He breathed out slowly and looked back to the window.

"Thanks Connor. I didn't think I'd ever hear that. Especially from you."

His mouth quirked up in the smallest of a smile and I for once acknowledged that he was right.

"I've changed. I think I might actually have a future ahead of me."

"I knew you did. You always seemed like the ambitious type. Proud of you man."

His smile seemed to warm the room and I was hoping mine was a counterpart.

"When are you getting out?"

The change of subject made him frown but his eyes remained bright as they focused on mine.

"Ten years. I'm being transferred in October. I have a feeling I deserve it though."

"You fucked up Justin. But you don't deserve it."

He cringed at his name but I knew he was thinking of the future ahead of him.

Yes, he had made a stupid decision and it was going to haunt him for a long time. But he's Jc. A broken boy from a broken home simply looking for his path to happiness. I really hope that he finds it.

"Thanks Con.." he trailed off but I could see something was bothering him and I motioned for him to continue. Now, there wasn't any secret worth hiding.

"..I feel horrible for doing what I did. Not just to you but to Ricky and Lilly and all the boys I brought into this. I made this such a huge deal when I could've backed out and refused it. I-I was desperate for money..I heard that my sister was alive in west Kentucky and I just..I freaked. Mierda. I'm such a coward. I'm sorry Connor.."

His voice began to break and I knew he was suffering. Feeling only empathy for the pressure he must have felt to join my father's cause, I brought JC into a comforting hug. His stifled tears and cries for mercy were silenced by my fingers that drew patterns in his hair- an act he had mentioned was a comfort him when it was just him and his mother.

JC was going to be okay.

This will all be okay.

I released a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding.

XxxX

It's late, if I have mistakes I'll edit them later :P