Memories

I Still Miss You...

The days had gone by and then they turned into weeks, then months, and then finally it had been a year.  Everyone still looked at you will that same pity look.  You had lost your wife, and now your a widow.  You had finally accepted it and really the only one who really treated you like a real person was your closet friends.  But they even had that same look every now and then.

You had grown to live with it.  You smiled at every sympathetic smile, accepted every look of sorrow.  All the while you were thinking about Lucy Heartfilla.  You filled your mind with only the good thoughts, but with every sad look or smile, it became increasingly harder.

You feel something heavy sittin gon your heart everytime you think about her.  You get dizzy and your head starts to pound.  You saw black spots and even though the pain became more barable each time, it still hurt until finally, you just lost it.

You're eyes were filled with sorrow, a sadness so intense that it affected people around you.  You knew that it wasn't right.  That when anyone came up to you, anyone at all, they could feel that you've been through something terrible.

"(Y/N)," You barley heard your name being called by Natsu.

"(N... Natsu...?" You said, not lifting your head up or acknowledging the fact that someone was even there.

Natsu put his hands on your shoulders, steering you to a chair at a table where everyone was sitting.

"Look," Gray said.  He had a look that matched everyone else's.  Sorrow.

"You need to know that you can talk to us," Natsu said.

"You need to get your head out of the past and look at the bright side," Erza added.

"Yeah..." Juvia added.

There were murmurs of agreement from the rest of the people sitting at and around the table.  You had your hands in your lap, balling them into fists and biting your lip.  You wouldn't cry.  You couldn't...

You missed Lucy dearly, and yet, you just can't cry.  You might want to... But after half a year, the tears had just stopped.  You don't have a single tear left.  You feel empty and weak.

"(Y/N)..." Natsu said.

"I miss her..." You managed to say quietly.

"That's ok!" Gray said.

"I'm stopped crying, I don't want to cry anymore and now you guys are making me cry..." You said.  "I want to be strong about this but I can't.  I just can't though, I keep remembering how I held her limp body and now I have you all breathing down my neck all the time."

"I know," Erza said.  "You still need to live your life though."

"You need to not nessicarily move on..." Juvia said.

"But you need to open up, you need to let us back in." Natsu said.

Lucy, You thought, I can't let you go.  They weren't there! They don't know!  The oain, the sadness, everything.  I want it all back!

"You can't throw everything away!" Someone's voice appeared in your mind.  You knew that you recognized it but you still didn't know exactly who's it was.

"Lucy..." You said quietly so no one could hear.

"Don't throw your whole life away!  You need everyone here!" The voice seemed urget.  "I know it's hard, I want to be back, I want to hold you again, but I can't."

"You have to understand that!" She went on.  "You know that you shouldn't be acting like this.  You shouldn't be this way, not to everyone who was there for you!"

"I'm sorry..." You said.  Everyone looked at you.  You looked up at all of them, and for once in a long time, you smiled.

I'm going to miss you Lucy, I love you, You closed your eyes, picturing her standing there and smiling at you.

"I love you too (Y/N)," Her voice faded, but you still kept smiling and knowing that things will get better.

Little Author's Note:

Sorry that this chapter was kinda terrible, I just figured that the story needed a little bit more of and ending.  So here it is and hopefully its not too bad for you guys to read!