Deciding My Fate

Chapter 2

"How on earth did you find me?" I asked.

"I like to come here to read," he shrugged, " I guess you didn't notice me. Now come on." He began pulling me out of the woods and to a blue truck parked in the driveway.

"Where exactly are you taking me?" I asked.

"Away from here. Mom will try to fatten you up with all of that sugary crap she has stocked in the kitchen. Dad will bore you to tears with all his talking about his new horse, and the twins will no doubt try to pull your hair out of your head again. Trust me, it's for your own good."

"I don't see what I have to loose," I said, jumping in the truck.

Alex drove down so many dirt roads, I lost count. He finally drove all the way down to one that ended in a clearing. He parked, and we got out. Alex seemed to know where he was going, but for all I knew, he could be walking me far enough out in the trees to pull a Sci-Fi number on me. I followed him in shoes that were not meant to be used for walking through dense green trees, uneven ground, and probably all kinds of animal no-no. We finally made it to a little creek that cut through the trees and the thick, red Georgia clay.

Alex sat down, so I followed suit, sitting next to him. "It's so beautiful out here," I said, mystified. The sky was so blue, conpletely cloudless, and we were surrounded by large, green trees. All there was to hear were the birds in the trees and the sound of water rushing by. It was like you were instantly put inside a bubble of calmness.

"Yeah, it is. I found this place a couple years ago. I come here when I need time to escape."

We sat like that for a while, taking in every beautiful thing. I watched a blue dragonfly zip past us as I continued to try and pull myself back together before turning to Alex and saying, "So is there any way I'm ever going to get that back?" I nodded towards the flask that he had carried here with us. "The thing is mocking me."

He looked me deep in the eyes. "When was the last time you took something?" he asked.

"What do you mean? Are you suggesting that I'm high? Because I'm not, even though, honestly, I wish I were," I replied.

"I saw some antidepressants in your bag. When was the last time you took one?"

"Oh, those? A few days ago. I hate the way those things make me feel."

Alex looked at me, I guess trying to tell if I was telling the truth or not, before shrugging. He opened the flask and took a drink of his own before handing it to me. I took a drink, letting the alcohol burn down my throat. Then, without putting much thought into it so I wouldn't think to change my mind, I poured the contents of the flask on the red clay beside me.

Alex gave me a questioning look, raising one eyebrow. His expression asked the question; no words were needed to convey what he was thinking.

"Booze is nothing more than another drug, it clouds my mind and keeps me from thinking things that should really be taking over my mind. It delays the inevetable. It doesn't get rid of it. It only hides it, putting it off until a later date. I'm tired of putting it off. I might as well face whatever's in store for me head-on," I said, in barely more than a whisper.

"Not trying to be rude or anything, but didn't you just say that you wished you were high?" Alex asked me, a hint of sarcasn in his voice.

"I sorta do, and a part of me regrets pouring out that drink. But I'm deciding my fate now, not the drink or the drugs. Like I said, I don't like they make me feel. They don't do anything for me anymore."

"Spoken like an addict that has had a breakthrough. I'm so proud!" he sarcastically said.

I laughed; I couldn't help it. "I missed that sarcasm, Alex."

"So you just missed the sarcasm, not the person? I mean, it has been four years. Surley you missed me just a little bit?"

"I missed you a lot more than I can tell you," I said, smiling. In a sudden burst of bravery, I wapped my arms around his neck and gave him a quick hug. I pulled away, saying, "I'm not the only one that looks different. What happened to you?"

"Well the last time you saw me, I was an awkward, scrawny, four-eyed, brace-face band geek. Since you last saw me, I went through puberty, lost the metal mouth, got contacts, and got into playing tennis. What exactly did you expect me to look like? At least my hair isn't pink," he said.

"My hair is not pink!" I said, slightly offended. "And I expected the awkward, scrawny, four-eyed brace-face kid. Who did you expect? The fashion-challenged, frizzy haired, dorky glasses wearing book worm?" I asked, a little frustration leaking into what I said.

"I don't know what I was expecting. Certantly not this," he said gesturing to me.

"Well I wasn't expecting you either," was all I said.

"We probably need to get back," Alex said, looking at his cell phone.

I quickly stood up and readjusted the fuchsia and black striped tank top with an entirely lace back and bleached denim short-shorts. I then returned my matching fushcia flats with a knotted design on the front back on my feet. I ran my fingers self-conciously through my hair and followed Alex back to his car.