"Alfie, why can't you stay? And show yourself to everybody?" We were both sat on the bed, face to face, idian seat. He was holding my hands and playing around with them.
"I can't Zoe. They all think.. I'm dead. I want it to stay like that." He said kind of hurt.
"Alfie you're talking rubbish. Everybody was devastated. Your parents are suffering as much as I am Alfie." I was looking at him but he was looking down at my hands. He sighed.
"Zoe I don't want to talk about this. My decision in mine. Unless you want me to go, I will. Let's just not talk about this. Isn't it enough that I'm with you now?" His grip tightened and he looked up at me, our eyes met. His hazel eyes were cold but my eyes were sore.
"But your family is--"
"Tell them I'm okay." He forcefully smiled and pulled me in for a hug. It felt so warm, like it always did. Alfie wasn't a romantic person, he gets embarrassed of mushy words and things. He gets so cringey about it but he always loved to cuddle. He's a cuddle monster and most of the time I didn't mind. It was Alfie's way of saying 'I love you".
Poppy
Since Alfie passed away, everything changed. He was my only sibling and losing my one and only brother made me feel miserable. I still stayed at my flat but I've come home to our parent's more often. Alfie was a good brother, although he started to bully me at our mid 20's, we didnt lose our bond. Me, Sean, Zoe and Alfie used to do things together, go places together, have little holidays, and chilled hangouts everytime.
Mum is actually getting better now. By the first few weeks she was absolutely devastated. I have no idea how would I ever handle a situation like this in mum's place. She's getting better now as she accepts that our poor Alfie has gone off to a better place. She is a lot calmer now but everytime something reminds her of Alfie she goes to her room and cries. I haven't been in contact with Zoe lately. Im planning on visiting her this weekend. Im really worried for her because she had her phone turned off and wont bother opening the door for any visitors.
I miss Zoe. I miss Alfie. I miss my little brother.
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Zoe
7:28pm
"Zoe! Dinner!" I hear Joe call from downstairs.
Alfie got up and kissed me on my forehead then he went off. I wonder where the bloody hell he hides. I sighed and headed downstairs. Joe's idea was probably not getting me and Alfie's way by not barging in the room or something. It was thoughtful of him.
I sat on the dining area. Ive never had a proper meal ever since. I ate take aways and stuff I could grab. I'd starve until it actually hurts so I'd have to go get something to eat. Joe sat infront of me and we shared a quiet dinner. All I heard was the spoon and forks clashing with the plate and Nala playing with her toy. I decided to cut the silence.
"Joe, do you believe me? That Alfie's still alive?" I asked lookibg at him. He didnt looked back and kept eating but he answered
"If that's what you say then yes."
I continued eating but I was distracted as I saw my ring. My beautiful engagement ring that Alfie gave me.
"If only it didn't happen.." I mumbled but I was quite sure Joe was able to hear me. If only it didn't happen, things would be normal. We could've been planning our wedding and talking about our future, me and Alfie. If only life wasn't such crap and hadn't taken away my Alfie at that very night
"If only I didn't screw up.." Joe said. He stopped eating as I did.
"It's not your fault Joe." I looked at him meaning what I said.
"It is. And I hate myself for it. I hate thinking how things happened because of me. That I was the reason Alfie died, that you are suffering like this and why everyone was saddened because of Alfie's death." He kept saying as his voice got louder and louder. Poor Joe. Has he been thinking this the whole time? Has he been blaming himself?
Don't blame yourself Joe.." I said starting to get all teary again.
"It's my fault Zoe! It's my fault Alfie has died in the car crash! I was stupid! I was there and I let it happen!"
--
Decided to have another update but this one's kinda short. Things are starting to unfold and secrets are being told 😉 It's actually still kinda early since it's just the 5th chapter so just let things be 😂
This chapter is dedicated to the lovely HollyCullens 💕
Whilst Im away, I promise I'll be thinking of story updates and how things are gonna work and evry detail connect for this story's ending xx
