A Dark Path

Untitled Part 2

In the beginning Castiel tried to multitask. On one hand, he was fully involved in Hannah's attempt to bring the rest of the fallen angels home and continue to fix the mistake the he had made more than a year ago. Secretly, he kept his ears open and his mind working in over speed on ways to fix Dean. Having two purposes waging for priority was taxing and stressful, but he couldn't force himself to give up one completely for the other. He couldn't abandon his family, not after everything he had done to them, all the bad that he had caused. He was an angel again, despite the grace not necessarily being his, and as such it was his responsibility to make sure Heaven was put back in its working order. But he couldn't abandon Dean either.

It was practically a miracle when Hannah made the decision of priorities for him and went back to Heaven to stay. Humanity was to be protected and be left to their own device without the warfare of angels, and the few angels left on earth would be ignored. This left him to focus on Dean.

In hindsight, Cas probably could have continued looking for rogue angels by himself, but he couldn't bring himself to force any of them back to Heaven without Hannah to do the actually persuading. What would he say to them by himself? That angels belonged to Heaven and not earth. Yet, here he was in love with humanity even more than any of them. Earth, working beside the Winchesters, was where he felt he belonged, and he couldn't see himself ever willingly return to Heaven permanently. Was he supposed to tell them the harm they did to their vessels? Even while he had completely destroyed his vessel who had long since died due to the dangers Cas had pulled him into. Was he supposed to tell them that earth truly held nothing for them? When he believed that earth held everything. 

No, Cas wouldn't seek out the rest of the angels who wanted to stay. There were other things that needed his attention, and now he was given the opportunity to fully concentrate on it. 

The only problem he was presented with now was how to find a way to cure Dean of the Mark of Cain. He didn't even know where to start. No matter how much he searched for information concerning Cain and the curse he had carried since the beginning of humanity, nothing about a cure was coming up. There wasn't even a hint as to what Cain might have tried, or about a safeguard that God might have put in. Not that Cas had expected it to be easy, but he had at least expected to find something.

For a week Cas drove from one motel to another, 'interrogating' one demon after another, and follow shadows that led to nowhere. 

After the first day of being alone there was a pit in his stomach that made him feel hollow and lethargic. As much as he concentrated on research and the following nonsense leads, nothing could change the insufferable emptiness of his vessel. Not too long ago Cas would have found this feeling unsettling and cause for questioning, worried that something that damaged his vessel past the point of being healed by grace. His time being human had shifted her perspectives on things such as these. For instance, he now understood that the hollowness he felt within him was loneliness. 

Knowing what he was feeling and acting upon those feelings were two different things, however, and Cas attempted to pull himself together and keep going. Dean needed him to find a cure, and Cas would stop at nothing to make sure he succeeded in this. Not even his own feeble emotions were going to deter his quest. 

And he was doing well for himself...for the most part. That was, until Sam Winchester called him.

"Is Dean okay?" Cas asked immediately upon answer the phone.

Sam's amused chuckle quickly soothed Cas' worry, if not annoyed slightly at the younger Winchester for mocking Cas in the first place. "Yea, Dean's fine." He sobered up. "Considering. I was actually calling to see how you were doing. You left with that angel and we haven't heard of you since."

There was in fact worry laced in the young man's voice, which Cas felt guilty for. Wanting to not be distracted from either of his missions, Cas had kept himself from calling the brothers. It hadn't occurred to him that they would wonder about his whereabouts or his health until they needed him. 

"I am fine. Thank you Sam. I am sorry for not 'checking in'." 

"Yea...so...what are you up to?" 

Cas narrowed his eyes at the question, finding it pointless, but he kept himself from pointing this out. "Nothing." This was a common response he had heard many humans give to that same question, so figured it would suffice. 

"Right. So, you think you could come back to the bunker?"

The question shocked the angel, and he may have tilted his head in confusion before replying slowly, "Yes, of course. I will be there as soon as I can." Which would have been a mere second a mere year ago, but now would take him about two days. He really missed his wings.