April 4th
You know that feeling you have when you love someone so much that it makes your heart ache to look at them sometimes? I had a similar reaction while watching my ex walk away from me, hand in hand with my now-former best friend. Cliché, right? There's a reason this is the stuff that movies are made of, folks.
Three months ago I would have said my life was over. Sometimes I think we need to step back and put things in perspective to fully appreciate what we have versus what we've lost.
For example, I have this amazing house that I bought at auction. It's in the middle of nowhere in Maine. I don't even think there's an actual town nearby anywhere. I just kept taking the train until I ran out of stops, and then stayed in a hotel for a while. I heard about the auction, went to it, and here we are. A house. It had always been my secret fantasy to fix up an old home and open an antiques and book shop. Had I stayed with my ex, I would probably be living in a huge echoey loft apartment in some huge city somewhere. Been there, done that.
If it hadn't been for the breakup, I'd never have gone out on a whim and never went insane enough to buy this place. I should send him and my ex-best friend a Thank You card and attach it to a flaming bag of dogshit outside their door.
All of that aside, it's not to say I have some sort of superhuman ability to transcend my sadness. Right at this very moment I am two bottles deep in Boone's Farm wine and singing along to The Cure at the very top of my lungs.
It's not like I have neighbors to worry about.
April 5th
A quick picture post before bed. It was a long day of cleaning, clearing and shopping for supplies.
In the afternoon I went for a walk, and came across this lovely little plant and flower growing in a shady area beneath a tree.
April 6th
In true Sarah fashion, I realized only once I'd left the party that I had these deep and meaningful conversations and never introduced myself. Obviously I'm Sarah. In case the image wasn't painted bright enough in the first entry, I'm single and I just bought a huge old Victorian home on the coast of Maine. Looking around me right now, I'm thinking I must be a special brand of crazy for thinking I could fix this place up. So... single, crazy, in debt up to my eyes, and isolated in the middle of nowhere with a certain penchant for the gothic romance sprawl of a decaying mansion.
OK, intro's out of the way? Good.
After the hangover from hell, it became apparent that I need to pull up my big girl pants and get down to business. What that entails at the moment is sleeping on an air mattress until my stuff gets here from New York. My plan is to keep everything in boxes and stored somewhere until the room it will go into is finished.
This week I'll be working on my bedroom, which should be a feat, as the previous owners loved orange... and pumpkins.
See what I mean? Not to mention the obsession with built-in furniture.
Quaint.
Did I mention that wallpaper is pumpkins, and it's on the CEILING?
Because it is, and it is.
I've got my work cut out for me, no doubt.
Also this week I'll be buying some new appliances and some groceries. I remember seeing a small gas station/grocery store on the way out here, so I'll ask inside to see where I can find a local home improvement store.
I think it's a safe bet I'll be away from technology all weekend, so have a happy Easter/Ostara/Full Moon, readers!
April 9th
