It was the day after I had such a terrible panic attack. I had all theses fears coming to my head, piling up one by one. I even thought if I didn't eat, I would faint or panic. Yet again I told myself, that's how it started. It went from a small anxiety attack to a huge one. This was probably one of the worst ones I ever had.
Has I laid on the couch, it was just me and my little brother home. Still resting away and sleeping good, I wished I was doing the same. Looking around in the living room, the feeling of being alone. Yet I'm not though, but I feel it in my soul. I felt has if I got up I would feel very shaky, which I was avoiding to do.
Thing was I needed to use the washroom, so I decided to make my way there. Standing right in front of the mirror, I felt has if I lost myself.
Being too afraid to look in the mirror long, I walked right to the kitchen.
Food was the first thing I thought in my head, because I was feeling a little hungry and dizzy. I felt the tension in my legs, one of the symptoms I felt yesterday. I tried to rush myself cooking KD. The microwave was the fastest way for me to cook I thought. As the time was going lower, I could just feel my legs starting to shake. All theses fears and thoughts coming to my head. I told myself don't be afraid, you'll get through this.
Has the timer went off, I started to drain my macaroni. Quickly trying to put the sauce in, I tried to go has fast as I could to avoid an attack that was trying to take hold. Speed walking towards the living room, I started eating. I felt a little better afterwards. It was getting to the time around 11am. My parents had came home, while sitting on the couch I decided to take a shower. Standing in the shower
I felt this wave. This dizziness that somehow controlled my body. I knew it, I started to panic a little. Trying to get out of the shower as fast has I could. I got dressed and decided to ask my friend to drive me to the nearest hospital. I knew I needed the help, I couldn't stand going through this pain alone.
Feeling trapped inside my body, I know I will never feel normal again.
YOU ARE READING
The War Inside My Head
Sachbücher"It was the day my life went crashing down, I felt has if it was my own living nightmare I couldn't wake up from. Even though I had my struggles getting right back up, I knew more dark days would come my way. So I had to learn the hard way, slowly...
