Payne of Knight

Chapter 33

Chapter 33

"You'll be okay, Kage. Don't worry about me."

"Kage, listen to me. Yes, you will. You found the strength to reclaim your name. You don't need me anymore. There's no need to cry."

"... I love you, Kage..."

Ω  

That day played throughout my mind for so long. It haunted my dreams, it haunted me while I was awake and I couldn't do anything to stop it. The only option was to accept the fact that Ivory was dead and that was hard in and of itself. The last person that ever loved me was dead. He died in my arms, his body went cold, his heart stopped beating, his smile faded. I watched them carry Ivory's limp body out of the Room of Elders. I kept trying to reach for him, to bring back to me. I ended up passing out from the wound on my leg. They were able to save my leg at cost of me walking with a slight limp on the left side but that meant nothing to me. I lost him. I lost it all.

The only part of that day that was...I guess...good was the fact that Ira ended up killing Matthew. Daniel and Nova were found and put to death because they knew what Matthew was planning and did nothing to stop it. I felt sorry for Daniel; I didn't want him to die. I really didn't. I tried to speak up for him but was quickly shut down. They were killed right on the spot. I had seen too much death in my life so I looked away. And that was that.

Ivory's funeral was a hard day for me. I stood there looking at him in his casket, wishing he'd just open his eyes and get up. I didn't even cry. Krystal was a mess. She bawled over Ivory, she kept yelling for him to get up, for him to open his eyes but she and I both knew that he wasn't. As the day went on I tried to comfort her, to let her know that she still had me in her life and that I wouldn't leave her.

"Kage...my brother is dead. He's dead. He's not here anymore..."

I embraced her and said, "I know. And this hole in our hearts will never be filled. Never." I buried my face in her hair. It smelled just like his. I didn't want to let her go. She was all I had left. She began to cry again and hugged her tighter.

"I love you, Kage."

I didn't know if I should say it back. I wasn't sure how she meant it. I knew she was still in love with me and I didn't want to lead her on but this wasn't the time to be thinking about me. This was about Krystal and I really did love her, so I said it anyway.

"I love you, too."

I felt a strong hand grab my shoulder.

"Who's this young man you got hugging you, girl?" The voice was deep and serious but I could tell that it was kind and loving was well. I didn't know who it belonged to though.

"Hi, Daddy," Krystal said against my chest. I stiffened. He was their dad? I was afraid to turn around. Was he going to beat me up? Was he going to yell at me? I didn't know and I didn't want to find out. Krystal wasn't letting go and neither was I.

"Why don't you face me, son?"

"Can I," I whispered in her hair.

She laughed a little and said, "Yeah, he doesn't bite...much."

I turned and faced him; he was about Ivory's height so he was taller than me by two inches, his hair was grayish silver like Ivory's, though his eyes were light brown. He damn near could have been Ivory's twin. I got chocked up just looking at him.

He titled his head and said, "Edward?"

"Huh?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, that's right, Edward's..."

"Dead, yeah."

"So, you must be...?"

"I'm Kage Knight, Edward's second son and Ivory's..."

I let my voice trail off on that one. I didn't know if he knew about us. What if he didn't? What if he did? Was he going to kick my ass?

He chuckled and said, "Boyfriend, I know. He told me."

I felt my face heat up, "Oh...well, yeah. I was his boyfriend and I was there when he died. I saw it all, so I won't be surprised if you hate me. I hate myself. I don't expect you to treat me like anyone special or important. I let your son die...I couldn't save him...I couldn't do anything." I began to cry. The reality hit me all over again. Ivory, the one I loved, was dead.

I felt a hand on my head and a chest on my forehead. He even felt like Ivory.

"Don't cry. He wouldn't have wanted you to cry, would he?"

"...There's no need to cry."

"No..."

"Then dry your tears, Kage."

He was so kind to me. I was expecting him to hate me, to even want to kill me. And at that time, I wouldn't have minded if he did. At least I would have been with Ivory. And one day I will be but, I had to live for others, I had to live for Krystal and our child. Yes, I ended up marrying her. It was hard for me to move on but I did. We had a son...and we named him Ivory Edward Knight. We argued over which order to put his name in but I won so Ivory's name came first. After my son was born I wrote Ivory a letter.

Our relationship...it was all I had to live for. I made the mistake of letting you die but there's nothing I can to change that. I thought that accepting your death was going to make it all go away. Nothing can make this go away but now I can go on with my life. Ivory wherever you are, please don't forget about the fun we had while we were together, our first kiss, our first time. And guess what? You're an uncle now! You have a nephew. Krystal and I named him after you and my dad; Ivory Edward Knight. So, I'll be seeing you. This is my final goodbye. You'll always have a place in my heart, and I'll always love you.

I tore the letter up and let it fly out of my bedroom window. I watched as the little pieces of paper fluttered into the sky.

"I hope you get this letter. Even though you'll get it pieces, you'll know that I'll always be thinking of you."