I'm holding the bad boy's boxers

The Trigger Happy Tangerine.

As Friday's last lesson drew to a close I couldn't help but think that the weekend couldn't role around fast enough, what with Chad continuing his passive aggressive attitude throughout the 32 hours since the incident. Not only that but I'd been invited to head down to Wooder's Brooke curtesy of Meg's new affiliation with Robbie.

As I exited the building I saw Chad make his way over to Carly who was waiting by his bike, he glanced over at me and completely blanked me.

Ouch

I plodded home that day wallowing in my complete isolation. Everyone in my life had abandoned me, Meg couldn't drive me home because she was "studying" with Robbie.

Please, who does that girl think she is kidding?

Trish was grounded because her mum found the crotch-less pants I had given to Trish last month.

Some people cannot just take a joke.

And...

Well yeh now I've exhausted my long list of friends.

When I eventually got home I tried to share my woes with my father. But as he put it "Britain's old, white racists have voted us out of the EU. Now America's old, white racists are a step away from giving a trigger happy tangerine nuclear launch codes. I mean hell, they seem to have confused the presidential election with a game of would you rather! The world is going to hell and you're sad because Trish's mum has a vendetta against some underwear?!"

And I mean, when you say it like that it belittles the fact that Trish's mum is going to die from the sheer weight of the frown lines which are slowly accumulating on her face. Blunt force trauma delivered by the accumulated weight of her humourless sorrows.

I headed off to bed early knowing that I will have Meg hammering on my door at stupid o'clock to ensure we got to the Brooke on time.

~•~

"Seamus move your fucking foot or a swear to all that is holy I will shove it down your throat until your fucking eyeballs implode!"

"Oh piss of Lexi this is my bloody footwell, I'll put it where ever the hell I like."

"Correction Jackass, that is three quarters your footwell, the other portion of that footwell belongs to my car seat. Now move bitch"

"If you were so bothered, then why did you sit in the fucking middle?!"

"Because last time I sat by the window Seamus Donagan, you tried to shove me out of the fucking car you bloody psycho!"

"Oh yeah." Laughed Seamus " I remember that."

"I could have fucking died!" I screamed

"Oh please we were going at like five miles an hour" scoffed Robbie from the front.

"Meg! Hit your lapdog for me." I screeched.

"And hurt his pretty face? I'm sorry Lex but that's not going to happen" laughed Meg from her comfortable, Seamus-free seat.

Traitor

"Why the fuck are they even here again?" I whined "You said you were giving Robbie a lift, you didn't mention he was bringing Tweedledick and Tweedlediv along with him!"

"Excuse me, can everyone present simply stop with the swearing, I cannot hear my music" Asked Sam, pulling out an earphone.

"OH PISS OFF" yelled Seamus  and I simultaneously.

~•~

"CUZ I'M HAPPY!"

"Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof."

"CUZ I'M HAPPY!"

"Clap along if you know that happiness gives you youth."

"Wait. What! That's not the fucking words Seamus!"

"Well how the hell would you know, you didn't write it?"

"Looked up the bloody lyrics"

"Well that's stupid, what idiot looks up the fucking lyrics?"

"I'm an idiot? I'm not the one who thinks the song is about the fucking secret to enteral life!"

"Look I'll sing what the fuck I like."

"Not if its ruining the song you won't shitdick."

"Swearing!"

"Piss Off!"

~•~

"I spy with my little eye, something beginning with "P""

"Plants"

"Penis!"

"Meg."

"What, it begins with "P""

"Parrot"

"Why would there be a bloody parrot on the motorway Robbie?"

"Pylon"

"People"

"Peugeot"

"Nope you're all wrong"

"Urgh, We don't know Seamus, we give up."

"Photosynthesis"

"What!"

"It's how plants make food Lexi."

"I know what it is Asshat, you can't fucking see it though!"

"Well you can see the effects of it!"

"We're not playing "I spy with my little eye the fucking effects of something beginning with "P"". That's like saying the bloody Ozone layer you fucking idiot."

"Oh I'm the idiot, I think you're just jealous that I thought of an amazing eye spy."

"Fuck off"

"You fuck off"

"Swearing!!"

THWACK.

~•~

"What took you so long guys?" Asked Tara.

"Yeh we've been here over an hour" Said Dominic.

"Sam, why is your nose bleeding?"

AN// Sorry I know it's short, it's just to say exams are over, I'm back from holiday and I'll update soon.

Chocolateteapot ❤️