For starters this is a story that is mixed with real life events that have happened. I'm not saying everything in this story is real. But not all of it is fake so please keep that in mind while you read and comment . Thank you . :)
Bury your sins in the sand and let the shores wash them away. Rip your heart out and leave it to die, because anything is better than the pain.
Those were the words I lived by, the words that kept me somewhat sane. I don’t know when life got so bad. . . No scratch that I do. It started from the very beginning. I had always wanted to be a daddy’s girl, too bad it never happened. I guess I wasn’t good enough for him, just wasn’t worth his time. I use to relish when he would call every 3-4 months. But as I got older I would ignore his calls and pray to God that he wouldn’t come by and try to talk to me. But I guess what you could say really pushed me into the point of what I thought was no return would’ve been what happened those six years ago, when I was just 10. . . .
“Mommy please don’t go” I looked my mother dead in the eye hoping she would listen to me and stay. I don’t know why I wanted her to stay tonight of all nights. It wasn’t any different than any other, at least that’s what I thought.
“Sweetie you know mommy has to go to work.” She said giving me a light kiss on my head before reaching for the dented bronze door knob with the dark specks. She smiled at me before slipping out the front door. I felt my head lower as I made my way back up the stairs to where my step-father was.
“It’s okay she’ll be back.” He looked down at me and gave me a big cheery smile of which I returned. To say I loved my step-father would be an understatement. My own father was never with me so when my mother found Chris I was over ecstatic. He had given me more than just a father figure he had given me a brother a complete picture perfect family. But the only problem with pictures is that you only saw what you wanted to see.
“Yeah I know. I don’t really know why I made such a big deal about wanting her to stay.” I said with a wobbly smile on my lips.
“It’s fine just get your rest you’re going to need it for school tomorrow.” He gave my head a quick pat and walked back into his room before I could say another word. I sighed and closed my eyes. I was a tad bit tired but I really wanted to stay up and wait for my mother. I had no idea what time she would be back but I was sure I could last at least until 9.
I don’t know what made me wake up from my dreamless sleep but I wouldn’t say that I was too happy with whatever it was. Before I could even make a move I felt my bed dip with the pressure of a body. From this point on I couldn’t say I knew why I kept still but something, maybe instinct, told me to not move to continue like I was asleep. I felt a hand slide across my waist slowly skimming over my pajama dress, pushing it up ever so slowly. The fingers slid over my underwear like it was trying to mesmerize the feel of my Barbie underwear. It was almost as if the fingers were the eyes.
Please Daddy come save me, I called out to my step-father hoping somehow he would hear my telepathic message and come rushing to save me.
The fingers dipped inside of my underwear pushing the band away from my hips. I closed my eyes even tighter and felt my breathing falter a little.
Princesses and gorgeous gowns filled my head. The images swirled together until I was standing in the middle of a dance floor all by myself. I was dressed in an emerald green dress with clean white gloves and a silver tiara filled with diamonds and sparkling emeralds. I looked absolutely stunning with my short hair done in light curls and my make-up as natural as could be. I looked up as a tall man with the most striking features looked down at me.
“Would you allow me a dance, Mademoiselle?” The handsome stranger asked me in a deep loving tone.
Before I could say anything I was ripped away from my beautiful ball full of royalty and glitz.
“I know you’re up,” said the cold voice. “This will be our little secret okay Annalise?”
I didn’t answer, I couldn’t. I felt him lift his heavy body up off my mattress and go back to his room. I closed my eyes and prayed to God it was just a nightmare. He couldn’t have done this to me. I felt the tears claw their way up to my eyes and spill over. I didn’t lose my innocence that night, No I lost something much worse. At ten years old I had lost myself.
