Faded Away

|TWENTY-FIVE|

"Jacqueline Brookes. What in the hell are you doing here?" Blake practically yelled as she yanked the door to my Jeep open. I sighed and knew that she was gonna rip me a new one. I grabbed my bag and cell phone before following her into the house. It still had the same furniture but it felt different, I missed it a lot. It held so many memories, not the happiest but still. I proceeded to sit on the familiarly comfy sofa and listen to Blake tell me how much of an idiot I am. I wasn't opposed to the accusation but I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry.

"You are ridiculous you know that? He's ready. You were upset because he wasn't talking about y'all's relationship in public. But now that he's ready to take more strides forward, you run away!" Blake was furious. I understood where she was coming from and the more I thought about it, the more I felt like an idiot.

"You're right. I am an idiot. I never thought that one day someone would actually love me enough to say they wanna get married. And here I am, completely and utterly terrified of screwing it up." I sighed heavily.

"Well what are you waiting for? Go home. Tell him everything. You love him with your entire heart and soul because if you didn't, you would still be living in this house with me. So go, and I'll be expecting a wedding invitation just so you know." And with that she practically shoved me out the front door and made me get into my Jeep. I drove all the way to Florida, just for Blake to push me out of the door withing 10 minutes. Nice.

I stopped at a gas station and rested my head against the steering wheel while I waited for my tank to fill up. I heard the loud click of the pump and removed it from my tank. I was ready to go home but I was still freaked out. I picked up my cellphone and dialed Luke's phone number. It rang once or twice before he answered.

"Jackie, baby, are you alright?" He answered breathlessly. He sounded so worried and upset. It broke my heart that I did this to him.

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine. I came to pay Blake a visit but I'll be home in a few hours. Listen, I'm so sorry for running out on you. I love you." We kept the phone call brief and I sped down the interstate to make it home before dawn.

I was able to cut the 7 hour drive almost in half by driving at a speed well over the limit and not stopping once. I needed to go home and be with Luke. I needed to not be a coward and run from all of my problems or fears. I needed to kiss and hug and hold Luke and not take him for granted because I realized on the drive home that he could love anybody else in the world but he chose me. He didn't have to go back to Florida and find me but he did. Everything he had done was for me, he dropped it all for me and I run out on him, really? There was no way in hell I was gonna let this go. I wasn't the same person and I needed to prove it to myself.

I arrived at the property just as the light began to seep through the night sky. It was breathtaking. I couldn't believe that I missed it every morning. I parked the jeep next to Luke's truck and ran inside. He sat on his recliner in the living room with the TV on. He was fast asleep with a throw blanket covering his legs. The light from the television screen accentuated his facial features. I nearly cried at the sight of him. He reminded me of my father when he'd wait up all night for me to come home when Luke visited many many years ago. I grabbed the television remote and shut it off as I blinked back a few tears.

"Luke, I'm home." I gently shook his shoulder until he let out a loud snore that scared me half to death. I fell backwards onto my behind and began laughing hysterically. I laid down on the floor in a fit of laughter which woke up Luke, surprisingly, because that man could sleep through anything.