The Miracle of Compassion (Loki Fanfic)

Chapter 5- Haunted

Mira gasped as his gaze intertwined with hers from across the hall, and for a breathless moment she was worried that he could peer into her mind and see beyond all of her deception. She felt as though someone was really, truly seeing her for the first time in her life. As though he was staring into the fathoms of her soul. As though he knew that soul as intimately as he knew his own.

A loud crash ricocheted off the gilded walls, the loud clatter breaking the nerve-wracking connection as both of them turned to find the source of the noise. It was one of the girls who had volunteered along with Mira, she had dropped a glass platter full of fruit. Mira quickly hastened to the girl's side, wincing in sympathy as the girl's cheeks turned bright red. She blocked the girl's view of the hall with her body, effectively shielding the poor girl from the sight of the others in the room as well.

"Are you alright, hon?" She asked affectionately, her voice calm and soothing as her deft hands helped to clean up the mess. The girl nodded, swallowing heavily, hands shaking. Mira gave her a friendly smile. "I'm Mira..."

"I'm Annett..." The girl murmured, smiling shyly. Mira smiled broadly and stuck out her hand and shook Annett's. The pair quickly finished cleaning the mess and Mira made sure Annett had safely escaped the hall, sheltering her from the looks of hundreds of curious eyes with her body. Knowing that after that embarrassment Annett would have a hard time concentrating, she didn't want Annett to suffer through the mortification of another accident.

She quickly returned to her station and looked for Loki once more, but all she saw was the Allfather where Loki had been sitting. She frowned briefly, disappointed that she had missed him in all of the tumult.

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He was beyond intrigued. He was captivated. Who was this girl? She had given him a fright, he could have sworn that she had seen past his illusion of the Allfather to his true self, all the way down to his despicable blue skin that marked him as a Jotun beast. He looked for her again, trying to catch her gaze. But her eyes slid off of him as she appeared to look for someone. His lips pressed together in a barely noticeable evidence of his displeasure. He had just imagined the moment earlier. Normally he would be able to brush this little instance off... But then he remembered how kind she had been to that clumsy servant girl. He had felt bad for her too, but no one else had helped the girl, none of the other servants even glanced at her as if to try to avoid the clumsy disease. He certainly hadn't lifted a finger to help. But that girl, the scarred one, she hadn't even hesitated.

He grunted as he tried to rid his mind of the scarred girl, taking a long swallow of his mead. He was simply lonely. Not that he would ever admit this to anyone, and especially not to himself... But he missed Her. He missed Her dreadfully. After that moment earlier that day where he so vividly remembered Her, his heart hadn't stopped aching. Stopped clenching. Stopped ripping itself apart. Not for one moment. Not until locking eyes with that girl. The scarred girl.

He gulped down the rest of his mead and stood from his seat, making a small speech about the restoration of the city before he swept out of the room. He didn't return to his rooms, he knew he was going to get no sleep that night. Not when his mind was so heavily burdened. He instead left the palace walls and walked to the stables, following the clitter-clatter of eight hoofs moving in harmony until he stopped at a stall and opened the gate.

"Hey boy...." He murmured lovingly as he petted and caressed the horse's muzzle. He leaning in and hugged the animal breathing in the familiar, soothing scent of horse and clean hay. "You miss her too, don't you?" He asked quietly, the horse rested his large head on Loki's shoulder in a horse embrace, chuffing softly in sad agreement. Loki took a deep breath, which shamefully sounded like a suppressed sob and fisted his hands in soft mane before leaping upon the horse's back.

"YAH!" He shouted, his voice a cauldron of barely controlled desperation. Man and horse reared up before galloping past the city walls into the woods. Loki shed his illusion, fitting once more into his own skin. His horse whinnied in approval and Loki ripped off his outer clothing, feeling caged in his ornamental armor. With only a tunic and breeches, he spurred his horse onward. "Faster Sleipnir!" They tore into the night, running as though they hoped they could escape the ghosts that haunted them.

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Hours later, when the last of the attendees left the banquet hall Mira sighed with relief and began to help clean up when she was told that a cleaning crew would come and clean as it was another group's shift first. Mira almost kissed the person in relief, her feet were killing her and her back was sore. She walked to her dorm room that she shared with some of the other girls. She walked by Annett's bed, concerned about her. She gently rapped her knuckles on the bedpost. "How are you, Annett?"

Annett, who was sitting in bed with a small palm-sized sphere in her hand, smiled softly and nodded in greeting. "Much better, thank you." She answered before she set the sphere aside and looked up at Mira earnestly. "Thank you so much for coming to my rescue!" She whispered quietly but fervently. Not wanting to wake the other girls, most of whom were already asleep in their beds.

"You're most welcome. Please don't worry about, it was my pleasure to help." Mira replied quickly, glad the girl was feeling better and safe from ridicule. Annett just smiled even wider as Mira waved goodnight before walking to her own bed.

Mira quickly changed and slipped into bed, her body melting into the mattress, spine unwinding deliciously. She was almost asleep when a striking pair of gentle green eyes filled her mind. She groaned softly and tossed onto her side, wide awake now. She had seen him. She KNEW she had. Her mind raced as she tried to put together all of the little pieces she knew. Had Loki attempted to kill Odin and Odin killed him in retaliation? Had Loki killed Odin and taken his place? Was she simply going mad?

She sighed heavily and tossed to her other side, she was so tired she might as well be insane considering how little her brain was willing to work at that moment. She rubbed her eyes in frustration. What was that in dinner all about? Assuming that it was Loki, what had she seen? In the moment she had been too preoccupied with what he might be seeing in her that she hadn't thought much about what she was seeing. She thought back and her chest began to ache. Those green eyes... So tired. So heart wrenchingly sad. He looked like his soul was starved, desperately wanting.

She closed her eyes, not understanding why the haunted look in his eyes was impacting her so deeply. But her heart ached for his pain. Wishing she could somehow spare the raven-head angel his inconsolable pain.