The Runaway Bride

46~ It's Time

When something hurts us we feel pain. When we go near a fire and our finger touches the fire, we sense it and move away, we make a change because of the pain we felt. If we did not feel the pain then we wouldn't have changed. Similarly, when you feel emotional pain, it is an indication that we need to change. There is something wrong. Say Alhamdulillah when you are in pain or are hurt...It is a sign from Allah :)

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Asley's POV

A few Weeks later.

I sat down in front of the main porch on the stairs leading to our front yard. Baby Waleed played in the mud with his sand castle making tools. He kept glancing towards me making sure that I didn't leave him and walked inside.
How insecure...
I smiled at the thought of insecurity.
Even though we love people so much but nevertheless we still feel that they might leave. Insecurity is always there within people, it might not be profound, but it's there.
However, I never felt insecure, Alhamdulillah, waleed never made me feel insecure, but, well, maybe insecurity is not just affair, cheating, and divorce.
"In my case, it was death" I mumbled.
I closed my eyes and felt shivers run down my spine.
I don't cry anymore.
I cant.
Does it make me a bad wife?
But I'm trying to be strong for my son...
Atleast I can't cry in front of him...
Maya's call interrupted my train of thoughts.
"Assalam o alaikum" i said
"walaikuksalam, how are you?" she asked.
"alhamdulillah, you?" i replied.
"alhamdulillah, so what's going on?" she asked sounding bored.
"Nothing much, thinking about insecurities..." I sighed.
"Insecurities!?!? We are not amongst the women who should feel insecure! Our husbands are extremely loyal, loving, and down to earth people, we shouldn't feel insecure at all. Infact, we should be proud and happy" she lectured.
"hmm, you are right" i said.
I can't argue her. Not at all.
"By the way, did you call ayan yet?" she asked changing the topic.

Ya Allah, now what do I tell her?!!

"No" I blurted.
"but i think it is time, i'll call him..." i added before she could start her next lecture.

"Acha, theek ha, jaldi kardeina, becharay ko ab zada intezaar mat karwao." (Ok, call him soon, don't make him wait too much.) she said.

We exchanged a few more words and then said our good byes. I went over to baby waleed and picked him up.
He was covered in mud...
"ufff, mama ki jaan, apka toh shower time hogaya ha!" (ufff, mama's little kid, its time you take a shower!) i said taking him inside.

I placed a kiss on his forehead and i got one in return too.
I wonder what life would have been like if I didn't have my cutie pie with me.

Alhamdulillah for everything.

Aisha's pov
"Thank you so much doctor" i said taking the file with my name labelled on it.
"No problem Aisha, just relax and spend your precious days with your son. He needs your love." my doctor explained.
I smiled and left the office.
Tears brimmed in my eyes as I made my way down the hallway to the main entrance of the hospital.
Waqt aur halat insaan ko kitna majboor kar daite hain. (Time and situation makes a person really helpless)
I had never ever imagined that i would have brain tumour.
I still can't believe it...
Kya ho ga mere beta ka? (what will become of my son?)
Kon sambhalay ga usko? ( Who will take care of him?)
Kon pyar karay ga usko? (Who will love him?)

I have decided that no matter what happens, I won't ever leave my child with feroze.
Honestly, I'm pretty sure he wont even accept ayaz anyways.
I brought a prayer mat from the dusty shelf. Haven't prayed in a while, I thought to myself. I glanced at ayaz, who was sitting on the bed ready to get his afternoon nap.
"baby, mama is coming ok? 5 minutes!" i said...
By now I am pretty confident that he started grasping stuff I say.

After putting ayaz in bed, I silently reflected upon everything that I came across. I have indeed made some very wrong choices in life, I have forced myself to be in someone's life who wasn't meant for me. Feroze, his name stungs, never had any space for me in his life. I have came to a conclusion that Allah has created a path for all of his beloved people. Some people's path compared to ours are like intersecting lines, they meet at one point and then continue on their own way. Some are coincident, always with us, they are our loved ones, the ones who love us alot. Lastly, there are people whose paths are parallel to ours, I must say that these people are the ones we love hard. Funny right?. What we do is bend and force our paths that Allah created to satisfy our affections and in this process we break them, ruining ourselves completely.
I sighed and picked up my diary and started writing more of my reflections and thoughts. This is the only thing I would be leaving for my only son. I have to make sure it is good enough to help him get through life without paying for the consequences of my wrong actions.

assalam o alaikum!

How are you all? Inshallah, I hope everything is going good.
I am perfectly fine, Alhamdulillah. Just extremely busy. Studies are getting harder and important. This story had a lot to come and many more twists and turns. The rollercoaster keeps moving upwards but later on, eventually the thrill of going down will be epic xD.
However, the chapters might get smaller but I will try my best to update regularly. All I can promise you guys is that this story will move you to the core so please hold on and bear with me. I won't disappoint any soul out there ❤️

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Until next time, stay blessed ❤️