Prince Foggy is always looked down on by his father, Michael.
"You need to find a princess, Foggy. You need to marry and take over this kingdom."
Foggy tried to explain that he didn't want a princess, he wanted a prince, but it was no use. So he decided to throw a ball, just to shut him up.
Meanwhile, in a house not too far away, there lived a small family. Edwina, plus her two daughters, Kendra and Gemma.
"MAM I'VE GOT MALARIA!"
"IT'S IN ME! IT'S IN ME ASS!"
As Edwina tried to calm them down, her stepson, Jimmy, sighed. He was cleaning the floor yet again, and wasn't even allowed to go to the door when the doorbell rang. Kendra and Gemma stopped whining long enough to listen to their mother, when she returned with four small letters.
"We have been invited to Prince Foggy's ball!" Edwina cried.
Jimmy's heart sped up. He'd been in love with Prince Foggy ever since he could remember, and he really really wanted to go to the ball.
"Well, apart from you." Edwina snarled at Jimmy, who let his long hair cover his face as he continued to clean the floor.
He sighed unhappily, and every night he dreamt of dancing in the prince's arms. On the night of the ball, the wicked stepmother and the ugly sisters primped and preened and got themselves ready to seduce a homosexual prince, while Jimmy sat in his basement room and thought about what he'd be missing.
The front door slammed shut, and ten seconds later there was a flash of glitter and a really rather attractive man was stood in front of him...dressed as a Venus flytrap.
"I am Jake!" He grinned. "And I am your fairy godmother!"
"You're a bloke." Jimmy deadpanned.
"Oh right, yeah. Godfather, then. Whatever. Do you wanna go to the ball or what?"
"Of course I do! But I can't, can I?"
Jake simply flashed Jimmy another grin, and waved his wand.
"Put that thing away!" Jimmy groaned, closing his eyes.
"Right. Sorry." He stuffed his dick back in his trousers and got his actual magic wand out, before leading Jimmy outside.
He somehow turned a random pumpkin into a carriage, found some mice - named Mel and Tinchy - and turned them into horses, and then he made Jimmy look dashing - in short shorts and a blue tank top.
Jimmy squealed. "Oh thank you, fairy godmother!"
"I'm a bloke." Jake reminded him.
"Oh whatever."
"Okay, you gotta be back at midnight, etc etc, have fun, be safe."
Jimmy went off in the carriage, completely unrecognisable, and got there in about five minutes. The party was in full swing, and it didn't take long for there to be a tap on his shoulder.
He turned around, and his heart stopped when he saw Prince Foggy.
"May I have this dance?"
Jimmy nodded, allowing himself to be taken onto the dancefloor. They danced for what felt like hours - in all fairness, it probably was; there wasn't much else to do at Foggy's balls (oo er) besides get drunk - and before they knew it, the clock was striking midnight.
"Oh no!" Jimmy cried. "I must leave!"
He rushed off, leaving behind a single glass slipper (always a glass slipper). Foggy sighed dreamily, picking it up. He knew he'd found the one.
The following day, Jimmy was at home when the doorbell rang. Kendra answered it, and she screamed.
"Oh my God, Mom, it's the Prince!"
Jimmy's head shot up. It couldn't be...
His heart pounded as he rushed upstairs, only to be cockblocked by his wicked stepmother.
"This was left behind last night." Foggy said, as Craig trailed in behind him. "Whoever's foot it fits will be the person I marry."
Even though this was shit logic because Prince Foggy was clearly gay, Kendra and Gemma tried the shoe on anyway. Alas, it didn't fit.
"Let me try it on!" Jimmy cried, pushing past Edwina.
He slipped his smelly foot into the glass slipper, and it fit perfectly. Foggy was ecstatic. He'd found his prince. Now all he had to do was come out to his father and the entire kingdom.
Jimmy and Foggy kissed passionately, they got married thirty seconds later, and they lived happily ever after.
The end.
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Only true fans remember
