Memoirs of an Outlaw: Life in the Sandbox

Chapter 33: Grandpa

When we were back in the States and I was still the company clerk, there were a few Marines who stood out to me when they checked in to the Outlaws. Some I remembered because of their personality. Some I remembered because of their attitude. And then there were some I remembered because I became close to them down the road.

Within the first month of the Outlaws forming, we began to receive a lot of new guys, or what we called boots, who were checking in straight from infantry school or who had only been with the battalion a few months. On one particular day, three PFCs from Alpha Company checked in, and I remember it so well because they all had last names starting with D: Jeremiah Doub, Brett Durbin, and Scott Dougherty. I was only a lance corporal at the time, but they all reported to my desk and stood at parade rest until I told them to chill out. And they all did except the smallest guy in the group, Dougherty.

After I had finished checking Doub and Durbin into the company, I began taking Dougherty’s information. Dougherty was this small guy who looked no older than a high school kid. I figured he couldn’t be any more than fifteen or so. He just had a very young-looking face. As he stood there at parade rest, I began to take down his personal information to enter into the computer. I would ask him a question, and he would respond, ending each response with a “Lance Corporal.” I thought it was crazy that a PFC was addressing me this way since the low-ranking enlisted guys were all on the same boat. So I tried to calm him down, but he wanted none of it. It was as if he was afraid to get in trouble.

I resumed asking questions, and I began to notice another little quirk: he had a stutter. Initially, I thought it was because he was overly nervous. He was sweating, he seemed jittery, and his face was slightly red. As time went on, it got a bit worse. That was when I really started feeling bad. So I ordered him to sit down at the desk next to me so I could finish taking his information. I also instructed him to call me Tanner without the Lance Corporal title. He nodded in the affirmative, sat down, and finally looked more at ease. His stutter also seemed to slowly go away.

From that day on, we struck up a little friendship. I tried to watch over him and get him situated within the company. I started calling him my little son because I felt I was trying to mentor him. Eventually, after Dougherty relaxed a bit and got used to the Outlaw atmosphere, he began to call me Grandpa. For those of you who don’t know me, and even for those who do, I have a little problem: I’m follicly-challenged. Gunny Rossignol dubbed me Bobby Bald Spots on my first deployment. It was funny as hell too. So Dougherty, following in Gunny’s steps, began to call me Grandpa because of my hair, or lack thereof. I still like to think he looked up to me, even though it might have been the bald spots he kept looking at. In either case, we formed a good friendship.

Another guy who checked in to the Outlaws was Lance Corporal Mark Engel. Mark was a mechanic who had come from another company. When he came to the Outlaws, I knew he’d fit right in. Mark was about my height but with a thicker build. He had a playful and rambunctious personality. He’d call things as he saw them, regardless of rank, which got him in trouble at times. And what I liked most about him was that he was adventurous. Nothing was too crazy an idea to him. He was willing to take risks where others wouldn’t. It was truly inspiring.

Mark knew a few of the guys from the company already, guys like Corporal Klinger and Corporal Sprenger. Since I hung around those guys day in and out, I began to get to know Mark as well. He was a blast to hang out with. There were a few times he and I would jump into his Jeep Cherokee, blast some tunes, and head out to the beach. When the four of us went places, I knew it would be a good time because Mark would be the life of the party and would get the rest of us in a party mood. All in all, Mark enjoyed life and inspired others to see the world and life as he saw it.

Throughout our deployment to Iraq, even though some of my buddies were in other platoons and our patrol schedules were different, I made a point to check in on them and hang out for a bit. Sometimes Dougherty and I would goof around talking shit to each other. Other times, Dougherty would come out of the hooch before I was going on patrol and would hand me some Kool-Aid mix that he had gotten from back home to flavor my water. Engel would be in our portion of the hooch almost daily, complaining to us about this or that, telling jokes or just reminiscing about old times. But no matter what, we all checked in on each other and we became closer because of it.