Diseased | #wattys2016

Chapter 8

Deep breaths. Deep breaths Riley. You can do it.

Riley's failed attempts at regulating her breathing were evident, due to the rapid falling of her chest. The air she drew into her lungs sounded heavy and forced.

Riley didn't want to do this anymore. She couldn't handle it. Over a month later, trapped in this sick asylum, with less and less reassurance that she will eventually get out.

And what is she to do if she did? Say, they release her in six years. Riley will be in her midtwenties, constantly being watched and checked on, being sure she doesn't 'go off the rails'. She would have little paying job, for the more time she spends trapped in this institute, the more she misses the education she needs to have a well paying job she deserves.

Riley wanted to be a doctor. The thought of saving countless lives, of being a ray of hope for those who are in dire need of her help seemed amazing. She wished she could take anyone's pain away. The thought of someone struggling tugged something deep within her. She decided she will give someone the life they deserved, even if she missed out on it.

But lately, Riley's mind raised more and more doubts. After her experience here, even the tiniest trace of blood, and she felt sick to her stomach. Seeing all these people, locked away with no real ways of treatment revolted her. All she wanted to do was get as far from here as possible.

She didn't care anymore if people thought of her as a monster. A murderer. A ripper. So long as she gets away from this place, she'll be fine.

But sitting on her butt for hours, being fed what seemed to be less and less food (with a bland, puke worthy taste) and being given more and more unknown pills, being surveillanced constantly by Jack, drained Riley of all her hopeful thoughts.

Ironic. She thought. Two months ago, I easily knew that I wanted to bring hope into the world. To save lives. But it seems that now, she needed something to bring her hope. Be her treatment. Her cure. She needed a doctor.

But naive Riley's thoughts were so clouded, drowning in her own pity, that she could not see then that her medicine was closer than ever.

***

"Well, since you won't speak a damned word to me, I'm just going to get out and say it. I'm sorry."

Riley could not help but deem Jack's actions to have their own well known pattern. This feeling of remorse he felt will soon wash away. Riley was sure of it.

"Hey! You heard me right?" Riley's lack of word choice lead Jack to continue. "Look. I see how much my rash actions have affected you. I have left you completely mortified of me. And yeah, don't get me wrong, I love when people are scared..." he trailed off with a hint of a smile, as if recalling some fond memories. "But for some strange reason, I don't want you to be scared right now. At least, not enough to constantly ignore me and insult me".

And he was honest with her. Riley's daily reminder of how worthless he is to her is found humourous in his eyes. Yet, for some reason, he doesn't think it's her morbid thoughts of him he likes to hear. He begins to worry that it's mainly just human interaction.

Jack never had to be around someone longer than Riley, especially every second of every day he's known her for.

He's mostly 'talked' with stuck up snobs that would insult him, only for him to beat the crap out of them and threaten them to never go near him ever again.

And that, they all did.

And even though Riley may not have much of a choice than to stick around, he found it oddly reassuring that no matter how bad he lashes out, she has no other option but to stay. She simply could never leave him, like the others in his life has abandoned him.

Riley, on the other hand, felt drained. She had no energy to bicker with Jack today. So, she decided to keep it civil.

She lolled her head towards him, stared into his eyes with her dull ones, and cracked out, "That's fine Jack. Truly, I don't even care anymore. Your actions have been forgotten".

Her chapped lips, dry throat and white, clammy face showed obvious signs of dehydration. On top of that, she looked tired. Sick.

It is unknown to her at the moment, but in her shivering state and burning head, she had a temperature of 39 degrees Celsius or 101.4 degrees Fahrenheit.

Jack shook his head, disbelief coursing through him. She had said the words he wanted to hear, yet, somehow, they bothered him.

Too easy. It was too easy.

"Um, are you sure? I mean, I can make it up to you somehow. I don't know how, but I can try..."

Jack's anxious state and foreign words shocked both of them. This was unlike him. This was different.

Riley gave him a half smile, that looked nothing but sad. "Don't worry about it. I'm serious. It's forgotten. Whatever..." She trailed off, finding trouble in keeping her eyes opened.

Too late. It's too late Jack. You're always too late...

Jack shook his head, feeling uncomfortable with the situation at hand. Just as he was about to speak again, he finally glanced at Riley's body. There was goosebumps all over, and she was shivering. The odd sniffling here and there may sound like she may have been crying, but in fact was just due to her phisicality.

"Are you okay? You don't look too well..."

Riley shook off Jack's concerned voice.

"Mmm, me? Yeah... Just fine... " she pauses to cough, a jaggged sound being echoed in their ward. After she clears her throat, she continues. "Ironically, I'm always just fine..." She tries to laugh, but ended up sounding like she's coughing up a lung. Something about this situation was hilarious to Riley. To Jack, she just seemed delusional, clueless on her little inside joke with herself.

He looks at her raised hairs on her skin. "No, you're not. You're cold. You seem to be sick."

He looks around then tries calling for a guard, nurse, anyone."Hey! A patient is sick. She needs medical care. Hey! Hey, can you hear me? He whacks his hands against the walls, kicking the metal door.

"Please... just leave it... I'll be fine..."

Riley's fetal body curled in the corner of their cell, her sweaty body felt sizzling onto the freezing ground.

At that observation, something within Jack softened. He pushed the mattress to her side, waiting for her to accept the kindest gesture he's done in a while.

He tries reaching for it to slide it closer to her, but Riley mistaken it for him reaching for her, making her flinch and cower away, further into the shadows of her corner.

This action hit close to home, making Jack lower his voice. "I'm not going to hurt you. But please, just take the mattress."

She looked into his eyes, and without a word, crawled on the battered looking thing and curled up on her side, passing out shortly after.

That evening, Riley's dreams consisted of her clutching her knees in fright, blending in to the corner as the merciless monster hurt everything in his path, trudging his way to her.