The fight for our souls

suicide

I tried to face my problems but the coward in me fled.

Thinking it would be wrong to kill myself......... as I sat there and bled.

Now soon death would embrace me and curse my soul for this sin

for not only I had taken a life but caused sorrow to my kin

but not the grim reaper, what I saw was a site!

and in that moment i knew this would haunt me in the afterlife!

It was my own mother standing there crying and screaming

and I knew this was the fate i had chosen for myself, not a nightmare, no i wasn't dreaming.

I tried to call out mama but everything faded away

the pull to death was so strong not even the muffled cries of my mother made me stay

I was woken by the ringing by bells

and argued with myself it couldn't be hell

no, this wasn't heaven or hell but a hospital bed

and my family stood there teary eyed looking at me with contempt

For i had done something that even my own mother couldn't ever have dreamt

Then i thought that they would leave me just as i had left them

but then my mother embraced me and nothing ever have felt better not even anything in the heavens

She said I thought I lost you and looked at me with tears in her eyes

I couldn't even hold her gaze as the guilt ate me alive

I finally learned after decades that all our fates our intwined

And don't you dare kill yourself unless you can bear the thought of your own mother dying.