I'd Rather Be in Love than Dead

Chapter Twelve

Justina's chapter, as you know, but she is currently not here to write the A/N.

Not that this chapter needs them; I'm actually just rambling aimlessly. 

So, enjoy(;

~Anna

Alayna's Perspective:

What was I supposed do now? Alayna; you’ve ruined it for yourself again. You have an amazing chance to really get your stories right and you blow it.

I really shouldn’t have said what I had said, I mean, who cares if John and Chasity are living together, he obviously welcomed her to stay as long as she needed to, and we all know that she wasn’t planning on doing that for too long, even if it is John, it’s still pretty awkward, they aren’t married, and they aren’t together, but they are friends.

It was definitely one of those moments where I was speaking on impulse. I can remember it clearly, Yeah, John, why’d you let her stay?

Now I’m on my own, probably. I really don’t know what’s going on now.

Alone with Zane, yeah I’ve been there thousands of times, that’s not the problem now, the problem now, is that my mouth has once again probably ruined another friendship. A friendship with John, who is really cool, and Chasity, my best friend ever; they have each other now and I’m glad that she has John, someone who will take care of her like she had with Garrett even when he talked back at her, and told her over and over that he didn’t need any help. Not that Chasity has ever turned down some help when she needed it. She probably wouldn’t feel right about it for a little, but she moved in with John didn’t she?

 The characters of my book that wasn’t even half finished, I’m sorry I’ve failed you two. I’m just sorry all over.

I sat there at my desk in my room, typing pretty slowly, I had nothing. Although I’d like to tell you otherwise, just because I’ve read countless romances, I still know nothing about relationships; in the real world at least. This was going to be my first official published novel. I could write the company, or I could just write an entire book on how I messed up!

John and Chasity would surly read that, especially if it was titled something like ‘Sorry all over again’ or just simply ‘I’m sorry’.

All of those ideas seem right in the moment, but if you say them out loud, you’d be pretty confused. I may be an author, but I’m still a dreamer.

A dreamer who makes mistakes, a dreamer who can’t write a book!

See how lame I can get?

Those could count out all of the crazy idea’s I’d get at twelve in the morning, still hearing the loud noise of the television; Zane never goes to bed early, and he never wakes up late.

“Alayna,” Zane said, sounding pretty upset.

“Hey,” I said, turning around to face him, wanting any procrastination I could get.

“I miss Chasity,” He said.

I nodded “Me too.”

Yep, pretty corny point we’re at eh? I bet anyone could’ve read that somewhere. Even someone who doesn’t read, they watch TV, it’s all over there too. As corny as it sounds, it’s still true.

This place can get pretty quiet, even with Zane here, sometimes he’ll be on the computer, sometimes he’ll be riding his bike around, he can do quiet things, then most of the other times when he’s being loud, he’s cooking. In fact, since Chasity has gone, I’d like to say I’ve been a lot more responsible, I’ve taught him how to cook a few things, I would of course, help him with the stove/oven, and he’d do most of the rest.