Unpredicted Love

Chapter 3: A Walk of the Past

They say that the Red River is one of few rivers that flows north to south. They also say that the river is very clean its just all the sediments that give it a muddy brown appearance. I approach the river bank, so many times I have come to this river over the last few years; it holds a lot of memories for me. Some of the trees on the banks still are bare from the cold winter sending them into a hibernating state. Some have awaken early at started to bud little green bulbs. As I get closer I see that river is flowing with decent speed. It still carries a calming environment.
"Crack"
At the sound of a twig giving way to my foot I am suddenly brought back to reality. I stop in front of the bank quietly appreciating the environment that surrounds me.
"This is a beautiful area," Isaac says finally.
"It definitely is, I come here a lot and clear my mind." I reply.
"I can see why, you would like it here so much. It suits you." He says. I just nod.
Neither of us clearly knew how to bring up the conversation we both knew had to be talked about as we just stand there observing the river in silence.
"So where did you go?" I ask
"You mean after our fight?" He asks. I nod my head.
"Well, it's a long story," he replies hesitantly.
"The path a long the river is about twenty miles I'm sure we have plenty of time." I say trying to lighten the mood.
"Fair enough. Well, that morning I had another fight with my mother about my father leaving. She told me she never wanted to see me again. Then we had our fight so I ran home and immediately packed my stuff," he begins saying.

I recall his mother being more or less a heartless crude old women to say the least. I remember I was at his house and one evening she walked in very drunk. You could smell the foul stench of alcohol from across the room. Isaac tried to help her to her room but as he reached for her arm she smacked his cheek. You knew it must of hurt not only by the loud smacking sound that it created one where you just knew that it was gonna be burning for at least a couple hours. You could see the bright red outline of her palm planted on his face. He was stunned and stared at her. I remember seeing tears weld up in his eyes. She stuck out her finger directly in his face saying. "It's all your fault! You're the reason why your father left me, you little shit." She boasted. Isaac tried to remain calm cause he knew she was drunk. I grabbed his hand and we went to my house for the night.

"At first I did not know exactly where I was going. I basically jumped from place to place," he continues.
"I finally ended up in the cities with my grandmother. She did not really question why I was there and over time I hold her what happened. She was very sympathetic and understanding. She told me I could stay as long as I needed to. After a few months I started to miss you..." His voice trails off.
"It's okay I'm not judging you we are just talking okay." I reassure him. He nods his head.
"After a few months I started to get into trouble. I started sleeping around at first it was just girls and shit. However I still wasn't satisfied so I started to just hook up with anyone including other guys. I was a mess. Angry at the world and life in general. One day my grandmother told me that someone wanted to see me. It was the weekend of my birthday. I thought it was you at first. It turned out to be my father..." His voice trails off again.
I just continue to walk in silence trying to process all of this.
He continues, "I was surprised to see him being it has been almost 10 years since he left my mother. I had no contact with him since he left either. He looked a lot better though, more happy. He told me the real reason why he left my mother. He said that he could never truly love her the way she deserved because he was a homosexual. I was lost and at first I felt like I have been cursed by God. However, that evening my grandmother invited my dad and his partner over for dinner and seeing them together opened my mind. The way he made my dad smile and laugh. I can't recall the last time he was so happy. Since that day I started building my relationship with my father and we have come a long ways. I told him basically everything even about our fight and the fights of my mother. He was actually the one who told me I should come and find you. I started to realize how much I have missed you Chris. The period of time after I left I was hooking up because I was trying to hurt you. I was pained by the fact that you were brave enough to tell me how you feel and deep down I felt the same but was hurt that you would jeopardized our friendship over it. Now I know that it was selfish of me." He pauses waiting for a response.
"I'm sorry to hear about the aftermath of our fight. I had no idea that you went through all of it." I reply. "However, even though I am partially flattered that you came back to find me...it doesn't change what happened. I know what you went through is rough but you have to consider my own feelings. Did you expect me to just wait for you to come out? Did you think you coming here would just fix it all?" I ask rhetorically. "I mean honestly what did you think you would accomplish by coming here?" I ask.
He stares at the pavement now.
"I do not know I just know that I am sorry for what happened and I want to make it right. At the very least I would like our friendship back maybe someday something more." He says still with his head down.
"I just don't know right now Isaac. I have moved on, and that alone took a long time to do. I guess right now all I can say is I'll think about it." I reply hesitantly.
"Okay, I understand." He says.

I look up over the horizon and I see that the sun is setting now. I stop at the top of the bridge that crosses in front of the river dam. The sound of water crashing over the rocks and the running water sends a very audible noise. The sunsets between the tree lines. The sun looks like a giant red-orange dome. Turning the sky around it a faded orange hue. I just gaze out into the distance. My mind is swimming in a sea full of information not sure how to sort it or what to do with it.

I feel an arm wrap around me and before I can resist the arms pull me into a warm familiar hug. I close my eyes unable to move. I can't help but inhale and a sense of relief fills me as the same Axe body spray scent enters my nose triggering past memories that I have locked away. I start to cry silently unable to control the mixed emotions that I am feeling. I feel the arms tighten around me. I grip his shirt in frustration but I refuse to let him go. A soft deep voice whispers, "I'm sorry Chris, I never wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry." He repeats it over and over into my ear. I turn and cry harder into his chest as he continues to whisper in my ear quietly. All I can think of is "Why?"

He continues to hold me tight as I gain control over my tears that trickle down my cheeks. His hand brushes my hair gently, it feels so perfect. I have waited so many years for his touch. I look up into his eyes searching for the old friend I use to have, wondering if he still exists. Sadly I run into a wall and find myself looking into a stranger. Tears start to resurface and I look away. Then a hand touches my cheek so lightly I barely feel it. It caresses my skin peacefully with care and concern. I look up again this time my gaze is meet by familiar blue eyes. Suddenly his lips crash down upon mine. A bolt of energy and lust rushes into my body. His lips interlock with mine like a key in a lock. The lips start to withdraw from mine. I want to whimper and cry as the lips pull away.