The Innocent Soldier - Linstead

Chapter 6

Erin's POV:

Hank and I walk out of his office and I don't see Jay or Ruzek but I hear Ruzek calling my name. It sounds like it's coming from the locker room. Hank obviously hears it too because he looks at me with concern and confusion. We run to the locker room and the sight breaks my heart.

EL- "Jay?"

AR- "I don't know what happened. He just said 'I didn't mean to' and broke down."

HV- "Ruzek, go back to your desk."

He nods and tries to leave but Jay has a death grip on him. I go sit next to him and hold onto him and gently pull him off of Ruzek. He lets go and grips straight onto me. Ruzek leaves and Hank leaves but comes back with a cup of water. He tries to give it to him but Jay won't let go of me. "Hank, can you give me a minute with him?" He nods and leaves.

"Jay. Can you please talk to me? What's going on?"

"I..I'm s..so sorry E...Erin."

"What are you sorry about?"

"I hurt you. I..I didn't mean to"

"Hey. Sh it's okay. I understand."

He just keeps crying into my shoulder. I don't know what I can do to sooth him. Hank comes in and crouches so he's to the height level of the bench. "Why don't you go home today, kid?"
Silence...

"Halstead, I'm telling you to go home. Get some rest."

He comes out from my shoulder and put his elbows on his knees.
"I'm sorry Sarg."

"Don't be, kid. I understand."

Jay gets up and goes to his desk. I mouth 'thank you' to Hank before I walk out. I just hate this. Everything about it. Jay might loose his job! I just wish I could be there for him. Some may say I'm there for him the most but I don't feel like I'm helping. He needs help. I just don't know how to get him the help he needs. I told Hank that I was gonna make sure Jay got home safely and then I was gonna come back to the district. "I'll be home in a little awhile. You're gonna get through this Jay." He hesitates to nod and goes to get a beer. A beer? At noon?

"Oh no no no. You're not gonna go to this. Jay if you go to drinking I swear to god I will drop your ass."

He starts laughing a little bit. I'm not joking but at least he's happy.

"We have beers lined up in front of the coffee creamer. I was moving them out of the way. No need to 'drop my ass'."

He smiles at the end. I smile back at him.

"I'll see you in a little bit! Love you." I say as I walk out. We've never told each other that we love one another but I really do. I love him with everything I have. Now is probably the best time to say it because I hope it'll encourage him to make it through this. I didn't give him a chance to say it back but he did look back at me in surprise. He has the whole unit for support, I hope he'll be okay..

Another month, another holiday, but the same aspect. This story was written in honor of Memorial Day to spread awareness of PTSD and fireworks. July 4th is known for cookouts, gatherings, and mainly, fireworks. It's a lot worse than Memorial Day. People all over suffer with PTSD. A lot of them are war veterans or law enforcement officers. You can get PTSD from anywhere and anything. PTSD is

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Mainly for war veterans, fireworks and loud noises can trigger terrible memories of war. Fireworks sound very similar to gunshots. Millions of people with PTSD commit suicide because it's too hard, or their PTSD is too much. Respect our war veterans. If you live in a compact neighborhood or near other homes, and if you plan on celebrating July 4th in your background or on your property with fireworks, please ask around and make sure nobody is sensitive to loud noises.

I didn't say this last time but someone I know dealt with this last Memorial Day, when you leave your house to go see fireworks or go to a cookout, make sure your animals are safe and secure, and maybe give them a shirt that smells like you or something to remind them that you're coming back home. Many animals go missing every year around this time because they're trying to find safety. They don't realize the safest place for them is right where they are. Just be courteous to others and have a wonderful July 4th!

-LinsteadTrash