No-name killed himself abruptly; no one saw it coming, and we were shocked for months afterwards. Apparently his brother had died in a car accident and he was being bullied outside of school. There were other reasons, but I didn't stick around to hear them if anyone was talking. We moved on though, as people tend to do, and Michael and I invited our friend Tré into the band as our new drummer. He was good, and we kept on, but I never could forget No-name. I miss him still.
Halfway through his junior year, Jimmy started hinting at trying to commit suicide as well. It popped up casually occasionally, scaring me half to death. The younger kids didn't really catch the references, but Michael and I shared knowing looks and I made a mental note to talk to Jimmy alone every time he started to talk that way. Jimmy and I spent a lot of the afternoons after school when Green Day wasn't practicing sitting out on the bridge over the river by our houses, talking through things. I can't remember how many times I talked Jimmy out of throwing himself over the edge, and I still remember the gut wrenching feeling I got every time he would clamber over the railing and dangle his legs over the water. In fact, every time I cross that bridge in my car now I end up holding onto the steering wheel so hard that my knuckles go white and my hands cramp.
Around this time, I met my first girlfriend Maria. She was beautiful, she was punk, she didn't give a shit about authority, and at that age, I thought I loved her. I even wrote a song and named it after her during the school year, which ironically turned out pretty well because she ended up dumping me and the chorus said "Maria, where did you go". She got a few more songs written about her over the years, and of the memories I have of our time, most of them are pretty good. She was an excellent distraction from the train wreck that was everything to do with Jimmy, but I did have to juggle time. My afternoons were filled with band practice, spending time with Maria, and keeping Jimmy alive (which was probably the hardest of the three).
