To My Future Boyfriend

2013 © karylliana

 *****

July 06, 20xx

Dear Future Boyfriend,

 

I don’t know why I’m writing this at the first place. But I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about you. It may sound stupid or desperate or whatever. I don’t care. I just want to ease this pain I am feeling right now.

Today, I got my heart broken. This is the 3rd time I had a break-up. My boyfriend, or should I rather say, ex-boyfriend, cheated on me. I already knew he was cheating on me even before we broke up. I just pretended I didn’t. Well, sucks to be me, right? What can I do? I just love him so much I couldn’t bear losing him. Either way, I still ended up like this. Left and lost.

How I wish you wouldn’t be like my ex-boyfriends. They’re all jerks! I wish you’re their total opposite. And I’m looking forward to the day we’ll finally meet.

I put the letter inside a red envelope as I wipe the tears in my eyes. I’ve been crying the whole time I wrote it, causing some parts of the letter to have smudged inks. But I don’t really care, at all.

I stood up, got my coat on my closet and went out of my room. I need to freshen up. I need some fresh air. So I went out for a walk and let my feet drag me and I found myself standing on an open area filled with grass. This place looks like an abandoned soccer field. I sat up under the shades of an oak tree.

No one else is here besides me. I look up and stare at the beautiful orange sky. The sun is setting. I smile at the thought of it. I think I found my sanctuary.

July 13, 20xx

Dear Future Boyfriend,

 

I’m writing to you again, don’t ask why. I feel better now. It really helps me a lot to move on when I’m writing letters to you. So, enough with the bitterness, let’s now talk about you.

I may not know your name yet, or who you are, or what your hair looks like.. You know, sometimes I wonder what you really look like. Are you tall? Are you cute? Are you sweet? What color of eyes do you have? Do you play sports? Do you like music?

Let’s get to know each other.. soon.

  

I sealed it again on a red envelope. I went again to the abandoned soccer field and put the letter on a box I hid under the oak tree. I opened the box and found the other letter inside. I sighed in relief. It’s still here. Maybe no one would ever dare to read these. And no one would ever pass by here, since this abandoned soccer field is a kind of place hard to look for.

  

July 25, 20xx

Dear Future Boyfriend,

 

Have you been in love? Have you experienced the butterflies on your stomach? Or blushing in front of somebody you like? Or being too cheesy?

Yesterday, I went out with my friends. And wherever I go, wherever I look, I always see happy couples. I would want to do that to you, too. To hold your hands, to hug you, to kiss you, to tell you ‘I love you’..