Dark Blue

The Beginning-Constellations

Copyright ©2013 by starfromouterspace. All Rights Reserved.

Picture used on front cover does not belong to me, and belongs to the respective owner. All credit goes to them. Any song lyrics used in this book do not belong to me, but belong to the respective artists/ songwriters. Any quotes or book references belong to respective authors.

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1

'Dark blue, dark blue, have you ever been alone in a crowded room?'

-Dark Blue, Jacks Mannequin.

I walk through the park, kicking aside autumn leaves. It is a clear cool day, and I like it, knowing that at night, it would be perfect. Today has been the same old day, hiding in the shadows, afraid to speak out. But I feel calm and glad to be outside. I stop by a bench and sit down on it, slumping into the seat. The park looks like a scene straight from a postcard. Families by the lake are feeding bread to the ducks bobbing on the water. Several squirrels run around, quick as lightning, chasing each other up the trees, their tails like little flags. I didn't want the scene to stop and I wish that it could be frozen in time.

Suddenly, a pile of leaves shower down over head from a tree above causing me to squeal and cower in my seat, my vision suddenly a blur. Spluttering as leaves got into my mouth, I look up to see some figures sitting up in the tree. I squint upwards through the branches and see that it's them, all laughing as a large sack sits between them, now completely empty.

"Hey Delilah! You going to say something? Or is little miss mute too afraid?" they yell down at me. I want to yell back at them, but my voice gets trapped in my throat. I stand up quickly, brushing leaves off my coat and out of my hair, before running away, their jeers and calls echoing in my ears.

When I get home, I'm out of breath and my cheeks are flaming red. But the moment I step through the front door, my mum is already standing there waiting for my return.

"Hello dear," she says, before faltering as she takes in my appearance.

"Why are you so red?"

I try to explain, but she's already moved on. From behind her back, she produces a stack of leaflets, all threatening to fall out of her hands with a single gust of wind.

"Here you are Delilah. These are all leaflets about courses you could perhaps take in the future, so you can become a doctor- just like me and your Dad. So," she pushes the leaflets towards me and into my arms, "why don't you take a look at them?"

I consider maybe telling her just then, so she wouldn't get carried away with all of this doctor business. But she smiles at me eagerly, and I couldn't.

"Yeah, okay Mum. Thanks." I smile at her, before walking slowly up the stairs. The moment I get into my room, the leaflets slide into the overflowing bin beside my desk. I'm never going to be a doctor. No matter how much they force it down my throat. I sit on my bed, tears in my eyes. Don't they see that I don't want this? Don't they see how much it hurts? No they don't; and I can never tell them. I just wanted night to come, so I can escape.

**

Later in the evening, I sit by the bedroom window looking outside, a discarded book lying open in my lap, untouched, as I count down the colours, the sky gradually getting darker and darker and my heart gradually beating faster with every shade. When the time finally comes, I get up automatically and the book slides down my legs landing on the floor with a dull thud. Tiptoeing out of my room, I hurry down the stairs as quickly and quietly as I could, without waking anyone up, grabbing my coat off the pegs and pulling it on with my shoes. I walk silently into the kitchen before quietly opening the creaky back door, now revealing the universe and the dark expanse that continued for miles. Stepping outside, I breathe in the cool night air as the moon shines above me.

The grass flattens beneath my feet as I walk slowly in the moonlight, like an ever following spotlight guiding me to the one place- the one place where I can really be myself. Soon, the hill looms over me like a slumbering giant, but I know better than to be daunted by it. As I had done so many times before, I pick out a path in the long willowy grass, a path committed to memory. The climb is steep, but I'm used to it, and it would be worth it- the long climb to be able to see what was at the top. As I come over the crest of the hill, the sight that greets me takes my breath away.

Even though this was maybe, what feels like the hundredth time I had climbed up here, it never fails in leaving me stunned. I walk forwards, stumbling slightly over hidden rocks and rabbit holes, my feet sometimes sinking into them momentarily. When I get to the middle of the grass, I flop down on my back and place my hands behind my head, not caring that it was damp. With a feeling of slight trepidation, I look up towards the glittering ceiling that covered the Earth- The night sky. The stars twinkled above in the constellations that I could trace with my finger. The big dipper over there, scooping up stars in its saucepan; the Pegasus, bearing down on surrounding stars; the Pole star that took up the royal residence up high, like a glittering diamond in a crown that belonged to the Queen of Sheba. Sometimes, if I'm lucky enough, I would see a comet fly past, like a hare racing through an obstacle course. And every time that happens, I squeeze my eyes shut and make a wish. Tonight the glittering dark blue sky shimmers in the still air. Quiet, yet perfect; and I utter the words that I say every night.

"It's beautiful isn't it?"

The boy lying next to me in the grass turns his head towards me, smiling as he says the answer I have grown to expect.

"Yes, yes it is."

A/N Hi guys. This story started out as a random attempt to enter the 2013 Wattys- about 13 days before the deadline. I knew I had no chance winning but to be honest, writing this story has been one of the best ideas I've ever had so I don't regret it. I've decided to enter it for the Wattpad Prize 2014- So please, vote, comment and SHARE this, if you think it's worth doing so. Thank you so much guys, and I hope you enjoy the rest of this story! :)

PS- dedicated to Michelle- Because this song is amazing! :)

-starfromouterspace x