CHANGE

III.

"I love you mom," I wheeze
She chokes on a sob and throws her face into my dad's shoulder.

"We love you too son," a single tear streaks down his face

"Be brave mom," I wheeze one last time.
I hear the sound of my heart monitor increasing in speed somewhere far away. I let my head fall back so I'm staring up at the ceiling.
And then it all fades.
The white increasing until I feel blinded by its intensity.
~
I wake up with a cold sweat.
I feel my tears streaming down my face and a silent sob escapes my throat.
Why did I have to think about that now?
A successful month of school passed, and now this?
I check my clock and sigh as I read the time
4:36 AM
I forcibly shut my eyes and try to think of something else.
After what feels like hours I check the clock again
4:40 AM
At this point I'm annoyed, so I decide to get up and get ready.
As I am entering the kitchen I hear a loud crash, like something shattering. Followed by a loud slam of the back door.
I look out the window above the sink and see a black leg disappear over the top of my fence.
The vase containing my mother's aloe plant is shattered.
All the noise woke up my parents who come running down the stairs, "What happened?!" They frantically ask
But I don't answer them.
Instead my eyes are focused on a note sealed with a red stamp on the back, containing a single letter, overlapping a crescent moon; G.

~

Why the hell will I need to know this later in life? I ask myself that same question following every problem of my calculus exam.

Just as I finish problem 5/20 the boy folds his test document up and hands it in the bin. Giving me a wink as he walks out the door.
How can he be finished already?!
And what was that wink?
Is he really smart?
Dumb?
A million questions race through my head.
And before I know it my teachers voice rings in my ears, "At this point you should be halfway through your exam,"
I look down at my paper and frown at question six.

The bell rings just as I complete the final problem.
My head is aching from all the stress and I make my way towards astronomy.

I saw the boy 4 more times that day.
In the bathroom, the library, the water fountain, and gym.
Each time I was faced with glances upon glances.
By the end of the day I was very confused and didn't even hear Mike as he asked me if he wanted to hang out.

"Helloooo? Eli???"

"Hm?" I ask, turning towards him.

He looks at me like I'm crazy then asks me again.
I decline, telling him I have too much homework and that my grandma will be coming to dinner tonight.

"Oh alright." He says, a hint of disappointment in his voice and hops in the passenger side of my car, and off we went.

~

"How are your grades?" My grandmothers inquirers.

"Très bien. J'aime astronomie. Il est difficile, et intéressant," I reply nonchalantly.

Everyone around the table looks at me.

"What?" I question them.

"What do you mean what? You were just speaking French..."

"I was??" I bewilderedly ask. Now I get why. My mind was on my French test that I have tomorrow.

"S-sorry. I have to go to sleep I have a big French test tomorrow. Goodbye grandma. Love you."

"Love you too sweetie." I hear her call as I head upstairs.

I shut my bedroom door shut and sink onto my bed.

My thoughts flew around my head like a hurricane.
Then the boy came into my mind.
Who was he?
Why did he seem so interested in being my friend?
Why was I thinking about him?
There were bits of the day when I would question myself these exact things. Then my head started to hurt and I willed my thoughts to shut themselves down, falling into a deep sleep.

~
As I fall into my seat the boy looks over at me and whispers, "Hi,"

"Hi," I answer back after about a minute

"Eli, right? Eli Clearwater?" He asks

"Yeah," I say, looking straight ahead.

"I'm C-"

"Alright everyone! Conversations over! Get your notes out. Today we're learning abo-"

The boy whose name started with C leaned towards me, clearly eager to continue the conversation.

"Mr Gray, if you have something to say to Mr Clearwater, I'm sure it can be shared with the class?"

"I was going to share my name with him. Then tell him I liked his shirt," The boy said politely.

I looked down at the old, sky blue button up shirt and wondered what was unique about it.

"It's Castor by the way, Castor Gray." He held out my hand for me to shake and I took it, causing him to smile toothily.

~

"Hey Eli," Mike said, catching up to me after we changed out of our gym clothes, walking towards my car.

"I turned up the AC, as today was a particularly hot day.

As we were cruising down the main road Mike turned to me and asked, "So who's that guy? The one who always stares at you? I saw you talking to him today. Finally acquainted are you?" He asked. Then, "where is Emma, anyways. You two hardly talk anymore!" A hint of sourness in his voice.

"I don't know. She's with her friends, I'm with mine," "she glances at me in the hallway. But I can't make out her facial expression. Sadness, anger, confusion. I just don't know anymore.
And his name is Castor," I say "Castor Gray."