forbidden [ hs taglish ]

chapter 8

-Jane-

sa loob ng 9 years, medyo hindi totoo angpagkasaya ko, sa loob ng 9 years sobrang miserable ng utak ko, kawalan ang lagi kong iniisip, kung gaano kamalas ng buhay ko, at kung gaano ipinagkakait saakin lahat ng bagay, i thought hinding-hindi ko na ulit makakamit yung kasiyahan na hinahanap ko, but i was wrong, pagkatapos ng 9 years na yon, finally, i get to be with my happiness again, nakita ko na ulit yung kuya ko na matagal na nawala saakin.Bakit nga ba ganon ka-importante sakin si Kuya? noong bata pa lang kami, siya lang ang nagiisang bestfriend ko, siya lang ang kalaro, kakuwentuhan, kaiyakan ko, sobrang close namin na hindi kami pwedeng paghhiwalayin at hindi pwedeng hindi magkikita ng isang araw, sobrang bait saakin ng kuya ko, lagi niya ako dinadamayan sa lahat, minsan nga pinagtatakpan pa yung mga kasalanan ko kay Dad, i remembered nga eh nung grade 3 ako, may nangbubully sa akin na higher level, isang beses tinulak ako nung nangbubully sakin, and then umiyak ako, tapos bigla-bigla nalang nagala-hero si Kuya, at pinagsusuntok yung epal na lalaki. We even made up nicknames for each other, and that is, Jaf for me, and Zaj for him, it's Jaf because, buong pangalan ko ay Jane Saf Malik, and Zaj naman dahil Zain Javadd Malik, Mahal na mahal ako ng kuya ko, and ganon din siya sakin, but it's not always happy in our home.

One time, we saw our parents hitting each other, i was crying so hard and my kuya was keep telling me to stop crying and to just go to my room with him, but i want to stop my parents, kasi sobra na sila magsakitan, pero wala ring nangyari, umabot din sa hiwalayan ang parents namin, and they went through the courts and everything, and then suddenly, one day when i woke up, i didn't see my Kuya next to me, i started crying and started screaming his name, and then when i found out my mom was gone too, i started screaming both their names. The day after, my dad finally told me that they're now gone and went to the other side of the world, my mom took my brother with her, and hindi ko alam kung saan, ang alam ko lang, it's either nasa US sila or nasa UK.

Months after my mom left, lumipat kami ng bahay ni dad, a very big house, with many and big rooms, it's a mansion, it made me a bit better, pero bigla nalang may pumunta sa bahay na isang payat at kulay yellow ang buhok, and she's with an almost 5 year old boy. My dad even changed our last names. As i grew older, nalaman ko rin at naintindihan kung bakit sila naghiwalay ni mama. naging steady din naman ang buhay ko with my step mom and brother, na ngayon ay 15 years old na.

Pero ngayon, hindi man nabuo pamilya namin, atleast nakita ko na ulit yung kuya ko, atleast nakita na namin ang isa't-isa.

"It's been 9 years right?" biglang sabi ni Kuya, nasa taxi na kami, papunta sa resort na iistayan namin dito sa boracay. kasama ko sa isang taxi si Kulot, Kuya, Niall, at si Ian.

"Yeah, i missed you so much, Kuya." sabi ko, at tumingin sa kanya.

"i missed you too, Jaf" sabi niya habang nakangiti at piningot ang ilong ko, sobrang laki na ng ipinagbago ni Kuya, hindi ko nga alam, member pala siya ng bandang kinaiinisan ko dati, oo dati na, haha malay ko bang nasa bandang yun pala nagtatago si Kuya.

"How's Dad?"

"He's actually got a new family" i said honestly, hindi ko pa ba sasabihin ang totoo? malay mo nga alam na niya eh.

"yeh, i heard he got a new son, right? does he still care about you? is he still feeding you or what?" sabi niya, tumingin ako sa taas ng ulo ko, kung nasaan ang muka nii Kuya, siksikan kami dito sa Taxi eh.