My Beloved

Chapter 1

   Moonlight pours down from the sky as I sit beside the vast lake that separates my world from the mortal world. The silver light reflecting off of its pristine surface as I stare blankly out at the opposite shore. I feel that if I stare hard enough at the shore that I will be able to see her. To be able to see her again, only if for just a brief heartbeat, would set my heart at ease. Ever since Chihiro left the spirit world my soul has been restless. I miss her with every fiber of my being.
   "Don't look back, not until you are in the human world." That was one of the last things that I ever got the chance to say to her before she vanished from my life like a fallen leaf in the wind. Taken far from my sight but not out of my mind. Her warm brown eyes peered into mine with such intensity and concern that it is a miracle that I didn't just take her into my arms and never let her go. Her youthful eyes staring at me with innocence and genuine affection. She asked me if we would ever see each other again.
   In all honesty, I have no idea if we will ever see each other again. Time passes in such a different rate for mortals than it does for a spirit. I have lived for centuries and it feels like I simply blinked and so much has changed. My home had vanished and my name had been stolen from me. One of which was returned to me by my sweet Chiriho.  A soft smile graces my lips as I remember the way her lips would curl into a bright smile whenever she would meet my gaze or finally accomplish something that would take the others mere seconds to finish. It was because of that beautiful smile that always seemed to stagger me and make me lose any sense of emotional or mental balance that I answered her.
   "I promise that we will." I promised her something so uncertain. How could I have been so inconsiderate of her feelings and her short life span? For all I know Chihiro could be all grown up and have found someone to spend the rest of her life with. I wrap my arms tightly around my knees as I stare out across the lake, the golden light of lanterns reflecting off of the distant water. My sudden reappearance in her life could completely alter how she loves her every day life. What if she has children of her own? How would she be able to explain my sudden appearance and identity to them? Chihiro.
   Her eyes had swam with relief and with hope when I answered her. Her grip on my hand tightened slightly. I lift my hand up and inspect it within the glow of the silver light. If I look very closely at my hand I can almost still see the smallest traces of her essence on my skin. I can still feel the way that her fingers had slipped away from mine as she ran across the dried up creek bed, returning to the family that our world had temporarily stolen from her. She seemed to happy on that day. Not a single care or regret in her mind. And all I could do was force a smile as she ran away from me, while my chest cracked and shattered deep within my chest making me stagger from the sheer intensity of the pain. I can't help but feel a selfish sense of relief that she never saw how absolutely crushed I was by her departure. Thankfully she was compliant with my command to not look back.
   That command in itself wasn't necessary. It's meer existence was entirely selfish. I only told her not to look back as she crossed into the mortal world because I knew that if we locked eyes before she crossed I would never let her leave my side. I released her into the world that she truly belonged to. My heart can only wonder if she remembers me.
   "How long are you going to sit here?" The familiar voice of Lin questions from behind me. I remain silent and motionless as I continue to stare out across the vast expanse of water. "It's been quite some time since she left here." She says softly.
   "I am aware." I murmur softly.
   "Then why are you sitting here?" She asks incredulously. "I know Sen, she is probably waiting for you right now." Her footsteps draw closer until she is standing right beside me. Her pink uniform standing out in the corner of my eye. I glance over at her as she stands resolute as she stares out at the lake not even sparing me a glance.
   "What makes you so confident that she is waiting for me?" I ask curiously.
   "You really are clueless Haku." She sighs deeply. "You were the only part of this place that kept her going. Kept giving her the motivation to get out of bed every morning and work in that horrid bath house. That sort of devotion doesn't simply fade away, no matter how much time has passed or how mush distance stands between you and her."
   "She truly is amazing, that small girl." I say with a grin.
   "Yet you're still sitting here." She chastises. "Just go to her already. It's obvious that you're pining over her." I say nothing as I slowly rise to my feet. "You can't just sit here forever and imagine what she is like. You have to go and find out for yourself."
   "Chihiro." I murmur as I walk up to the waters edge. I glance back at Lin as I feel the shift beginning to gradually overcome me. She simply smiles at me in response, her usually serious face seeming so much younger than usual.
   "Tell her that I said hello." She grins as she watches me rise into the sky. The cool night air carrying me higher and farther away from the shoreline and leaving Lin far behind and out of sight. The farther away I get the more my mind begins to become absolutely absorbed by Chiriho. The glow of her eyes and the way that light reflected off of her dark brown hair. I can't wait to see her again, to hold her hand in mine again and to look into her eyes once more. I can only hope that she will share the sentiment and be eager to see me as well. My speed increases as I leave the spirit world behind and enter into the world of humans and Chihiro.