(clever)
* Lives change like the weather. I hope you remember today is never too late to be brand new.
* Dear vegetarians, if you're trying to save animals, then why are you eating their food?
* A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
* They used to shout my name, now they whisper it.
* Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away.
* Stay sharp and far from timid.
* If a dentist makes their money from unhealthy teeth, why would I trust a product 4/5 of them recommend?
* Say Beer Can with a British accent. I just taught you to say Bacon with a Jamaican accent.
* Life is short, false; it's the longest thing you do.
* Work until your idols become your rivals.
* A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it. A dumb person creates it.
* Some days start better than others.
* These are the days we live for.
