Rich Girl Not So Rich

Rich Girl, Not So RichPart 4

Day 4
I hate my life.
I went home last night, no one else was home of course. And when I woke up this morning I found my parents in their office which is nothing knew. I asked mom if I could talk to her for a few minutes and she said I could. I was so happy, but then the stupid phone rings and she said,
"hang on darling I'll only be a minute,".
You wanna know how long she was on the phone for, if you said a minute you're very wrong. She was on the phone for an hour, an HOUR!
And when she got off the phone she had completely forgotten about me.
Do they even care about me anymore because I don't think so.
I just went back upstairs and cried. I cried for ages. I hate myself, I mean my own parents hate me so I should too.
All that with mom just made me feel even more depressed. Ive never been able to say I've felt depressed before because I WAS always happy but now all I feel is depressed. I Googled different ways to get rid of depression and none of the advice given on that website was very helpful at all, but there was something on another website that said it would take away the pain, cutting.
I've never thought about cutting before but I do know a couple of people who have done it and they've said it's really addicting and hard to stop. I've never thought about it until now. Now, cutting is all i think about and it scares me. I don't want to be stupid and let it get out of hand and all over something so little, not feeling loved by my own parents.
They probably hate, they probably regret even making me so why am I here?
What am I good for?
I went downstairs just before I started writting this and my parents weren't even home anymore. They didn't tell me or even leave a simple note. They probably just wanna get rid of me anyway.
The thought of cutting is getting stronger and harder to fight. I'm not sure how much longer I can keep it off. Im scared and it's at times like this I wish I could talk to my parents.