Smothered (bxb)

Promises

The next morning I got up early and made my way out of my bedroom to check on Gus. I walked out and saw him and my mother sitting on the couch talking again. My mother was still in her polka-dot pajamas, her long black hair matted with bed head. Gus was still in his clothes from last night and he had dark purple bags under his eyes, he looked very tired and emotionally spent. I secretly wondered if he remembered everything from last night.

"Rain!" I heard Gus say happily as he interrupted whatever my mother was saying. His tired face lifted up as soon as he laid eyes on me. I smiled at that and made my way to them.

"How are you doing this morning?" I asked Gus as I sat down across from them on the sofa chair.

"I'm... tired." He said slowly.

"You mean hungover." My mum said with a small chuckle.

"Again, I'm so sorry about last night! I...I'm so embarrassed." Gus hung his head and my mother gently put her hand on his shoulder.

"It's alright Gus, I'm just glad that we found you and not Frank." Gus gave her a shy smile and she took her hand off of his shoulder. "Anyways," She started, "I should go get ready for work, Gus do you want me to drive you home on my way?" She asked. Gus nodded thankfully and she got up to get ready.

"I'll leave in twenty, be ready to go."

"Thank you Olivia."

My mother smiled and walked into her room at that. I just sat there, on the sofa chair staring at Gus.

"I'm sorry." He spoke after a minute of silence.

"Why did you do it? You know that drinking scares me... Gus, my dad." I said shaking my head, still disappointed that he chose to drink. I wondered what had come over him, why did he think that was a good idea? What if he got caught?

"I... I know. I wasn't thinking. Frank was at the bar, and I was having a really bad anxiety attack." Gus started nervously, " I used to get them all the time when I was little. But I learned quickly that Frank never had any patience when I got like that so I had to hide them. I would pent up all my anxiety and feel like my mind was going to explode. For a lot of my childhood I got them, and as I got older they started to get easier to tame. So I don't know why, but last night I just flipped out. I started shaking uncontrollably, my mind was in a bad place Rain. I couldn't stop thinking about you and what those assholes  at school did to you, and thoughts about what would happen if Frank and the boys found out about you and me... and... and I just saw Frank's bottles in the kitchen cupboard and... and I thought it would help me be numb. I thought it would get rid of the pain. I guess I was wrong because as soon as I started I couldn't get the bad thoughts out of my head. Everything felt blurred together and I couldn't figure out what was real and what was all in my head." His eyes filled with a raw sadness as he put his head in his hands; he couldn't meet my gaze. I got up out of my seat and walked over to him, sitting down next to him on the couch. Our thighs were touching and I turned to look at his sunken form as he continued.

"After I realized that I was drunk I knew I had to get out of there, so none of the boys would see me. I walked around, wandered the streets and then I just kind of found myself here. It was like my subconscious was telling me I'd be okay, that you'd help me." He said in a quiet voice that shook ever so slightly. I gave him a small smile, which he didn't see, and leaned my head on his shoulder gently.

"I will always take care of you." I whispered. I felt one of Gus's hands wrap around my waist comfortably and I closed my eyes.

"I'm sorry I caused so much drama Rain. I'm also sorry that I wasn't thinking about how it would effect you. I honestly feel so bad. I know how much you despise liquor, I promise I'll never do that again." He said in his wobbly voice.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

We sat next to each other until my mother came out and told me to go lie down again. My head was starting to feel a bit better, less spinning, more like a throbbing headache. I obliged and Gus helped me walk to my room and excessively tucked me in, triple checking that I had everything I needed. I think he just felt guilty that he was always the one who always needed saving, and he wanted to feel like he could help me in return. It was really sweet. Before he left to go help my mum with breakfast he kissed me softly on my lips, earning a slight pink to rise up onto my face.

"Try to rest, I'll bring your breakfast in when it's done." He said smiling lovingly at me.

"Okay." I said quietly back to him as he walked out the door.