THINK ABOUT YOU / G-EAZY

19.

Little disclaimer: I know you had to wait super long for this chapter and I actually feel really bad because this isn't good or exciting. I actually wrote chapters 19. and 20. already but somehow wattpad deleted them so I had to rewrite and I just don't feel like they are as good as they were before. So yeah I'm very sorry.

I felt like I had hotboxed the whole city sitting on my balcony smoking blunt after blunt to the point I almost didn't feel my body anymore. I tried balancing the wine bottle in my hand still, I looked down at my work on the floor. I had started doing it again, my hands were covered in paint. Even the whole terrace was covered in paintings and out of one of them Gerald stared at me, directly. And I hated that it was my favourite that I had done so far. I seriously thought about sending it to him. But I didn't have an address. I didn't know where he was, no fucking clue. I would've turned on my phone to ask him and I hadn't done that in three weeks. And I actually didn't plan on doing it ever. I didn't want to know if he had or hadn't called. If anyone called. Callie had left for summer, so I had the apartment all to myself, I could smoke weed all day long and not go out.

Until today, when I heard the lock turning seeing my mum stepping into the hallway. "You're an actual pig." She said as she stepped on the balcony. "I don't recall giving birth to that." She laughed and sat down next to me.

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"I don't know, I haven't heard from you in a few weeks, that's even long for you." She said giving me her warm smile. "But I see it now, you're busy and alive." She seemed exhausted but still in a calm way as she leaned back in the chair. I handed her the blunt and she took it bringing it to her lips. Since I started dating Luke we started smoking weed together, without my dad knowing. He would've kicked me out his apartment if he knew. And he would do probably whatever was legally possible for her not to see me ever again."I like what I see." She said smoke leaving her lips as she talked. "I just wished you would let me help you and give you and exhibition."

"That would be stupid."

"You know it wouldn't be because you're my daughter." She had an art gallery, a really small one and offered me plenty of times to start there but I had always denied.

"Mum, can we not have this conversation now?"

"What's up with you?"

"Nothing."

"Luke again?"

"Nah, I think we're over, for real now."

"His parents called me to thank you for going to the hospital again, he's in some kind of rehab, but you know how they are..." I nodded, they had probably send him to some alternative clinic. That's how they were. They didn't really realize that their song had a serious problem that probably couldn't be solved by meditation. "You could've called me, if it would've been too much, you know?"

"Mum, I know, I was fine."

"Something is bothering you; Lola. I can see it. You're not good at hiding anything really."

I didn't say anything just looking at my hands, trying to swallow the lump in my throat.

"You know the university send out the stuff, and you made it, I'm proud that you're doing it. It's summer and then only a few weeks left,then you're done." I nodded. "You know it's not the career I had wished for you, but your dad probably knows best, huh?"

"Mum," I groaned. "It's almost done, I did it, he's happy now." She sighed, she hated that I did what my Dad does, she hated that I should become a lawyer like him. That I had listened to him instead of her and went to university.