RANTS 101

when yo BFFL steals yo man

Like so today I am very super upset and emotional because my BFFL told me that she loved my Hunni bunny Justin Bieber when she totally knows that he is MY one true love since primary school and NOT HERS!!!!!!!!!!!

So like I'm such a good friend because when she told me that she was crushing on LUKE HEMMINGS!! I stayed the Cadbury vegemite chocolates away! Even THO I KNEW THAT HE WAS TOTS IN LUV WITH ME AND HAD A CONNECTION. Like just the other day I was driving with my mum to the shops and just when I picked up the donuts LUKE HEMMINGS VOICE CAME ON THE RADIO!!!! IT WAS LIKE JESUS CALLED HIM ON AS A SIGN FOR ME TO LISTEN TO!!! The universe obviously wants us to be together!

But yeah like I was saying, I chose to ignore GOD FOR MY FRIEND!!! GOD!!!! And I'm a CATHOLIC like she should be gr8ful to have someone like me WHO WOULD BLATANTLY IGNORE JESUS FOR HER!!!!!!! 

But NO!!!! Instead she chooses to cheat like a lowlife idiot on my poor Justin!!!!! Like wth, HE DID NOTHING WRONG AND U SHOULD BACK OFF BEFORE I SLAP U SO HARD YOU'LL END UP HALFWAY AROUND THE WORLD! I Honestly, I dare u to try me. I can't even! Ugh people are so stupid these days I just wish they would all fall off of Everest and drown in my poodles butthole (honestly, this is only insulting to my poodle) and get what they deserve!!!! What happened to justice!! God, I hope you're listening! She's going to go right pass heaven and into hell where she'll spend all of eternity, I bid her good luck, just saying, she's going to need it.

LITERALLY, KNOWING HER SHE'LL PISS ME OFF EVEN MORE AND SHE'LL FALL OFF THE FACE OF THE WORLD! Btw guys, I also really need to per rn but I'm stuck in a 2 hr bus ride in the middle of nowhere.....what am I doing with my life? I'm not even halfway there, this is ridiculous cos I just got off like a 6 hr flight!

I SWEAR MY LIFE FLASHED BEFORE MY EYES COS THE BUS DRIVER SAW SOME ROADKILL AND HAD TO SWERVE IT TO AVOID IT! I think I saw the light, but the poor animal did not deserve that. HELLO, AINT THERE NO JUSTICE  IN THIS CRUEL WORLD!!!

And I mean that animal didn't even do anything to us!!! WHAT IF IT HAD A FAMILY!!!!!! It could've had like a daughter named Bianca and a son named Fishca and a wife called Pattty. I mean I don't know about ya'll but if my parents got run over on the side of the road with their guts just SPILLING OUT EVERYWHERE I wouldn't be happy!!!! Can we just take a minute to bless that animals soul and wish it luck in heaven?!?! I mean I don't want to be offensive to anyone who's like an atheist or anything but I believe in Jesus and I hope that that animal is in a better place right now. AINT THERE NO JUSTICE!!

Xoxoxo JC, cya next wk

PS. My BFFL told me to leave a life hack 101 for ya'll. When u go to McDonald's, order a regular cos it's just "nice" in between a small size and a large size. AND LIKE THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE REG AND LARGE FRIES!!!!!!!!!! ITS A WASTE OF A DOLLAR FIFTY. I  COUNTED THEM MYSELF