What can be worse than just hating being you, hating the person you became this years .
It sucks .
People always tell me that i am beautiful , but please its not a choice , i didnt choose to see my self as an ugly fat person .
I just cant see beauty in me .
Its not a fact that it is the nature of being a woman . ( i dont see myself as that)
I don't even feel like a female . i hate called like im one .
I know ive born a girl .
But i didnt choose it .
It scares me and i hate feeling scared and frightened .
It hurts so bad , you really cant do a thing .
You feel stuck and not able to do a damn thing .
Its all people's fault .
People are bad and mean . they really cant help . maybe they want at first but by time that person get tired of just helping an useless person .
Right now i really cant control my ideas and how they just annoy me .
Fuck me !!
( Im really so sorry i know you may have heard that stuff a lot , yes i know people hate listen to that sad shit , but i really really got now no one to talk to . thanks )
Ive really experienced so much things in this year . i did so much things .
There is some things that i really hated and others i really kind of enjoy doing it .
Yeah of course as a teenager im just trying new things and seeking for myself , seeking for the someone i want to be .
That's what i get told everytime , yeah people i understand dont worry im not that stupid , i am actually but not to misunderstanding what i am doing right now .
I don't know why they didnt tell me , as much of people i don't really have that kind of parent that really understand you . same as everyone and thats how everyone seeing everyone .
Im sorry for being so dumb .
I cant get enough from apologising for anything , for being sad all the time , for being so stupid , for not helping , for not being funny and friendly , for not helping ... Like so much things .
Im just sorry for being me .
No matter what people say i would never believe i am beautiful .
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Thank u so much for ur time i know its just bullshit but ... Anyway have a nice day .
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Lies
Teen FictionHello , it's summer and as usual we get bored i didn't know what to do , so wattpad changed the boredom a little . It's just writing here and there about what happened this year . the change of everything