So in the spirit of Harry Potter's birthday I decided to take out my Harry Potter Insults Handbook, that I got for my birthday, and put it to good use. I am going to write down some awesome insults from the book.(I do not own these insults, they are all from The Unofficial Harry Potter Insults Handbook)
Warning: these are only to be used against wizarding bullies and siblings. This also may contain spoilers for Harry Potter.
1. You're so ugly Voldemort won't speak your name.
2. Every time I get close to a dementor, I'm forced to relive our very encounter.
3. Avada Kadavra didn't kill Dumbledore, your breath did.
4. Does Hagrid know your out of your cage?
5. Here's some floo powder. Be sure to speak unintelligibly!
6. You should be the fourth Unforgivable Curse.
7. When you encounter a boggart, does it turn into a mirror?
8. The difference between you and Snape? Snape had a heart.
9. You're about as smart as Dudley is skiny.
10. I'd send you to Azkaban, but that'd be unfair to the prisoners.
11. You're so fat your patronus is a Couldron Cake.
12. I can tell why you didn't get an O.W.L in Transfiguration. Otherwise you would've done something about your face.
13. I'd say that I like you, but I shall not tell lies.
14. Leave before I do something that allows me to see a Thestral.
15. You suck the life out of a party like a Dementor sucks a soul out of a mouth.
16. Let's make an unbreakable bow that you never come near me.
17. If only Death would take you as his own....
18. Your the reason Mandrakes cry.
19. I should have taken some Felix Felicis this morning, then maybe I wouldn't have seen you today.
20. Aren't you on the cover of 'Monster Book of Monsters'?
21. You don't have to worry about anyone ever slipping you Amortentia.
22. Unless the prophecy says you are going to walk away right now, I don't want to hear it.
23. Your personality is worse than all seven Horcruxes.
24. Quietus!
25. A flobberworm has more personality than you.
26. It's a shame Cedric Diggory had to die and you're still here. (*fangirl cries softly*)
27. When I look into the mirror of Erised, everything is the same-you're just not there.
28. If you had a Pheonix, it wouldn't bother with rebirth.
29. Go insult a Hippogriff.
30. Your face had the same effect on me as a Puking Pastille.
31. I also grab my forehead in pain when I think about you.
32. I'd play beater if you were the bludger.
33. What's that in your tea leaves? Please say the Grim!
34. Your face broke Colin Creevey's camera. (*fangirl sobs in the distance*)
35. I bet if you looked a basilisk in the eye, it would die.
36. Your breath is an Unforgivable Curse. Or is it your face? (I made that up)
37. Go splinch yourself.
38. I wish you were a Horcrux, that way you'd be destroyed right now.
39. Accio shut up!
40. Slytherin should have locked you in the Chamber of Secrets.
41. You should try a little Reparo on your face.
42. You're worse than a Dursley.
43. Not even the Hufflepuffs want you.
44. I've had better conversations with portraits.
45. You'd look better if you joined the Headless Hunt.
46. What did you say? Sorry I don't speak idiot.
I'm going to stop her before I bore you all with more insults. I hope you liked them and will use them against bullies and mean siblings. I wish a merry happy birthday to Harry Potter! Goodbye my pineapples!
YOU ARE READING
Thoughts Can Be Random
RandomHaha, I disappoint you now. You think this is going to be some awesome book I am writing.....it's not. This is just a book of random thoughts and emotions so I can just ramble on and ask y'all's opinions on my books and ideas.
