My heart it used to beat at some point in my life maybe when I was younger like 10 but past that I was hurt by my father by my mother by my brother by my sister and so on .what the fuck was I here for ! I mean I have only suffered all my life I lost all my innocence and from that point my life's been crashing violently into the ground leading me straight to hell little did you know I was already there suffocating in this horrific place we call home .I never stop hurting its just hidden really good I'm wearing this personally made disguise .it hides everything so well and for anyone who's wants one can have one if you give me your soul cause I need one so bad and maybe ill feel something cause not feeling .really sucks its hard when the only emotion you feel is pain and anger .what the fuck am I gonna do if I'm always so ... FAKE!!! maybe ill cut my wrist ya know do it like the emo's we can all sit around in a pool of each others blood as we all slowly fall into that eternal slumber we've been fighting for ?who knows but. how many people are hurt because of love ?how many are hurt because of bully's ? how many because of yourself ? ... It's all so fucked up but hey that's just life am I right ? And you only YOU can choose what you do with it end it or let it play out to see how you'll end up fucked up or healed who knows ?...ik I wanted all this crazy shit to end I took that bottle with no hesitation I looked in the mirror I laughed and I chugged those pills down they went . I was ready to feel them poison me ready to never awaken again god I was just so tired of fighting and for what the future. FUCK the future it's the present what do I do right now suffer fuck that ill take the easy route thank you ... GOODBYE world I yelled to only find myself being rushed to the hospital by my mother . god dammit can't a person die in peace ... The messed up thing was I didn't care that people were worried yes I'm that selfish maybe I'm evil maybe I'm crazy but hey you tell me cause I know the exact answer . When the doctors asked me why I did it I said "because I FELT LIKE IT " . I heard my mom gasp in the background and the dr just said well why'd you feel like it and I said because I hate everything an everything hates me... that was last year it is 2013 and I'm still crazy as fuck still hiding my pain and still feeling nothing so I guess I was born a void of pain and suffering cause not only do I feel it I cause it and it satisfies that hunger I so crave well I mean unless I rip my flesh open with a sharp shinny piece of metal and then the only person I hurt is me and the evil is subdued for now it seems I'm just one crazy bitch...
