The Darkest Question

Chapter 5

As I descended down this whole black darkness, I at last found myself at, what felt like, the last step. I felt the sharpness of the rocky ground pushing up against the souls of my feet. The darkness cleared with looked like an orangery glow from afar. I herd those faint screams again; although, the screams I herd sounded as if they were miles away, further away. Eventually, I saw dim swerving lights from afar, in the darkness. The light was enough that I could see a rocky ground beneath me and a drop a few feet away from me. I was on a cliff, a black, rocky cliff, overlooking a huge range, with fire burning on the areas below and afar from me. The light from the fires afar only dispelled a hundredth, a fraction, of the surrounding darkness. The vastness of the scene both impressed and terrified me: Was I going to go down there. How would I even get down that great chasm? Was it there that I would find Astrea? The thought of a chance to talk to her, to see her, to tell her how sorrow is, most honestly, all I have left. That hope. The creature, the beast, who was standing behind me, started to move to an area, in the darkness, to the left. The glow of the fire from the miles afar lit up some of his horns, just enough that I could see it walking toward an area near the side of the cliff that looked like it dropped downward. He turned toward me and his eyes lit ablaze. The fire from his eyes gave off light enough that it dispersed a certain amount of darkness as to let me see only a few feet in front of me, enough to walk toward the creature. When I reached the beast, I saw, also, the begging of a winding path; however, I couldn't see past three feet in front of me. I looked back over to the creature, who was standing there, in a most menacing way, starring at me with those blazing eyes, in the middle of this great darkness. I stood there, in the cold, then I herd the creature scold me, once more, in that monstrous voice.

"Behold

child

this Great

Meander"

He said, as he looked toward the path. The wind blew a hard icy breeze.

"For if thou wish

to repute your slander

Thou must find

With all your candor

Thy own way down

down this Meander

For I/

shall not

give you guidance

nor lead you

away

from the lions"

The knot in my chest ripped, as I herd it speak. I pleaded with him, in that cold dark; "But, how am I going to navigate this? I can't even see!" His eyes blazed further, and he moved toward me, almost pushing me off this great dark chasm. He let out a horrid scream;

"Reckless, Reckless, empty and infectious!

Wretched thing, sorrowful soul.

How dare thee ask such a question

Thinking Thou art to escape this toll"

He went on, motioning toward the twisting path;

"Go on, Child,

and find your way,

for the path shall be shown to Thee

For Thou shall find this Great Meander

more of a trial than all of your life"

I looked down at the path in front of me, the dark and twisty path. I looked at the three feet in front of me, that was lit from the beat's eyes, and saw what looked like a rusted pole off to the side, hugging the wall of the cliff side. My eyes followed the rusted pole up, and I saw attached to the top of the pole a black banner. I stopped for a minute, looking intently at it, when I herd the beast huff in that horrid way, that by this time I knew was a sign either continue or follow. Since it said it wasn't going to guide me, I looked forward into the dimly lit meander. I saw only a foot in front of me, as a result of the fires from afar, and began to try and navigate the steep decline ahed of me. My feet cried with soreness, already, from the harsh rocky ground, and my body couldn't stop shaking from both the cold and the fear. As I began to navigate the meander, I herd nothing, and saw very little. I stopped for a moment, holding myself steady, careful not to fall or tumble over. I looked into the darkness, the blackness; I herd no screams, no huff from the beast, no roaring of a fire, not even the faint howling of the icy wind. I herd nothing. I saw only the blackness in front of me, and felt only the prickly path. I was on this decline, this twisting path completely alone. The darkness and the meander itself wasn't what scared me, what eerily stalked my imagination, what petrified my mind. The realization that I was most undoubtedly and unquestionably alone was what scared me most. I thought back to Astrea. I thought of how I might not be here but instead with her.

I thought of her face, how it looked when I woke up in the morning, and when I kissed her. I thought of the future we could have had together. I killed our future, betrayed our future. I robed her of her own future too. As I thought about this, my eyes started to tear. I started to cry. I started to cry profusely. I killed my love. I killed the one who made me happy, who I made happy. Every time I thought of her smile, her holding me, and I her, it became empty. All the love I had for her become a betrayal to her. I betrayed her. I betrayed her love, her body, her affection, and her dignity. I couldn't go on. I stopped and fell to the ground and utterly surrendered to my sorrow. I betrayed her. I betrayed her. I betrayed her. As I said this, my knees already being stabbed by the rocks on the path, the coldest wind that I have ver felt pushed towards me. The icy wind chilled my body, and immediately had frozen my tears. "Astrea", I said, in a hushed tone, with shaking body, with a slight and cursed whisper, "I'm so sorry"