Rollercoaster

Part 7

I was so close to running away again but I didn't want to do all this again. Instead I settle for ignoring him. It's working well actually, he is really trying to get me to speak, the more he tries, the funnier it gets. He hasn't said anything about Alyssa which is good. I'm not being funny, but I was starting to like her and trust her again but nope. She is still the back stabbing person I used to know and she transformed my only decent friend into one too. Good one. I feel like I should speak to Shawn soon, I do feel bad, but I hate him. I think. Recently not only has my life been crazy, my emotions have been up the wall too. He made me angry, so I should be angry. But he found me, so he is my hero. Oh goodness I am a mess. Ok I need to clear this up. I am going to speak to him. Right. Here goes. Come on Bethany. A little bit more. That's it. Breathe in and out. "Err Shawn. Can I speak to you?"..

No going back now. First of all I need to know more about Alyssa. Apparently he never liked her and he had his eye on someone else, the only reason he went out with her was because he needed some company during the time I was gone. So basically he replaced me. Anyway, I can't let that distract me. Next I guess I need to know why he came to find me. He told me it was because he thought it was his fault (it kind of was if I'm honest) and he wanted to make it right. When I ignored him and stopped sending him hints, he thought I was dead and he would never had forgiven himself. So the moment he saw me he couldn't let me leave hence why he gripped me so hard. Shocked, I become speechless, did he really care or is he just saying that. All I can do is cry right now. He wraps his arm around me like he did the day we first met. After moments of silence he finally speaks...

"Bethany", I look up whilst attempting to stop crying. "Bethany, I know you probably hate me right now but you have to believe me when I say this" he stops and I can see the nervousness in his eyes, "I... I... I love you". What? Is he being funny? How? I mean it's me. The girl who has made his life hell and now he tells me he loves me. I sit there in silence as he walks out of the room. Should I tell him I love him too? Should I tell him I love him too... I love him. Oh my. I do, I really do. I have only just realised. I need to find him now, "SHAWN! SHAWN WHERE ARE YOU?". I can't find him anywhere. I run down the street, still in my pyjamas, "SHAWN". I see him in the distance. I should have know he was sitting under that tree. He told me he always went there when things were tough. "Shawn, please look at me", he doesn't but I continue, "Shawn, I love you too". This made him look, so I repeat laughing and crying at the same time "I love you". He picks himself up off the ground and hugs me so hard, I now know what these hugs mean - he doesn't want to lose me again. At that moment, that magical moment, he kisses me. I can't believe how long I have waited to feel that soft press of his lips on mine, all I know is it was too long.

So I suppose this is the end of the rollercoaster. I have been thrown up, down, back, front and now it has stopped for now. I have finally found my ground, I am very happy with how it has been since then. I guess that is it, I may have lost my family along the way but I have Shawn, who is my new family for now.