Random Thoughts And Stuff So You Know I'm Alive. Yay!

In The Closet And Confused About My Sexuality Fun Times!

Note: It's currently 2:56 am so this might just be a big mess of emotion.

Awhile ago someone came out in my class and during their whole talk half of me kept thinking "You should come out too... You're Gay just like them and you should get all this stress of hiding it off your chest." but another part of me was like "I'm glad they're brave enough to come out but, YOU'RE STRAIGHT AF."
I listend to the part of me that said "YOU'RE STRAIGHT AF" and stayed silent. Another kid came out a week later and I was torn again, one part of me said "I'M HELLA GAY TOO, I WANT TO COME OUT WITH YOU" a second part of me said "Okay, you might not be exactly straight but you're not Gay ethier so shush." I kept quiet again.

Now I've come out to two people, who have promised not to tell anyone. Don't get me wrong, now I've accepted the fact I'm Gay but I'm still confused. Here's what I think on a daily basis "Girls are cute, I've always preferred them right?... Wait guys are cute too... am I Bi?... I would date a MTF or a FTM if I liked their personality, so do genders matter?"
I haven't experimented yet so I guess I wont know 'til then.

My current senpai is a KAWAII AF pastel goth with pink hair. I know virtually nothing about her (except that she likes to draw), I don't even know if she's Gay and I wouldn't ask someone I barely know that... I don't think my senpai has noticed me ethier, and since I have anxiety she probably never will.

Yeah, that's it for now...
kthxbye