Been A Bad Boy - Chatting Desires, a Ryan Guzman Fanfic

Chapter 4 - Wish You Were Here

Ryan sent you a Snap

I almost thought he forgot about me. Like I said, it's been a few weeks since we first met and all this tension between us makes it all feel unreal. Since we met, we've talked like every single day about our lives and simple things, you know. But the last time we spoke, I felt like he was disconnected, not just from the Internet, but also with me. Wasn't I good to him? Wasn't I likeable ? So I felt like it was over before it even began.

10 days passed since we talked, it felt like fucking forever for me. I don't know 'bout him, but I feel like this Snap might be the answer to my questions. It's a video.

Hey babe. Sorry I was quite absent the last few days. I'm filming that movie and it's gonna be great. Next time, I want you to come with me. Wish you were here!

Woah. Is it going to fast. I mean, he wishes I'm with him and I can't even wait a day without having the simplest conversation with him. It's been 10 days. Almost two fucking whole weeks. Made me feel like crap. Didn't know what was happening and it makes me jealous.

jealousy
[jel-uh-see]
noun,
jealous resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantage itself.

Maybe I'm jealous of his life. Everything he does, he does it with success. If he wants to do me, it will be like he just won another trophy.

But, however, what if I'm REALLY the only one for him. That would make me his boyfriend. UGH!!! I'm lost. You know, this feeling like in the movies where there's the devil telling you something on one side and an angel telling you the complete opposite on the other side ? Well that's how I feel when it comes to him. And I don't know how to act, because it's the first time in my whole life that I feel LOVE for another person.

I'm questioning myself since a long time now, kinda forgot to answer him.

Ryan sent you a Snap.

Another video.

Well I guess I went too fast for you. Didn't want to scare you or anything. Just wanted to be sure that you knew you are the ONLY one for me. Please answer me babe !

So, I sent :
FYI, I'm happy that you're truthful to me. But kinda hard to know what's going on between us since we only saw each other once. When will you be back?

That was a quickie ! :
Hopefully, tomorrow. Do you want me to come at your place as soon as I land ? Kinda have a nice surprise for you ! Everybody watches me, but you're the only one I see babe.

I answered positively to his "date" at my place. If only society would let us be together fast without telling us we're so bad for going too fast. I wish to quickly understand what I feel for him. Physical attraction or love ?

Ryan sent you a Snap.

Woaaah. Is physical attraction part of love because if that sneak peek isn't heaven, surely hope that this love brings me to hell! ;)

After all, I wish he were here with me too.

TO BE CONTINUED...