Worlds Collide

Chapter Two

22nd of August
Dear Diary,

It's been two weeks since she kissed me. I showed Ruby the video, and she told me to delete it. But if I did, then how would I ever complete this dare? I made a dickhead decision. I showed the group the video, and they took my phone and shared it. Then I lied and said it was a manip. That was enough to make them delete it, then apologise to everyone for "lying". But it still got back to Miss Swan. "Detention after school, Miss Mills." I went, but refused to speak to her. She said she'll put me on detention for as long as she has to, just to make me talk to her.

So I became a smartass and said hi. Then we got deep and meaningful about our families (after she took my phone to make sure I wouldn't record it all), and then it was time to go home. I don't know why, but I didn't want to leave the room. When I got home, I took up a friendship that I hadn't had in ages. A friendship with the special little sharp object called a blade. I cut my legs and arms and stomach.

Basically just everywhere on me that I hated. I wrote stuff with the blade like, "bitch", "slut", "cow", "mistake", and lots of other stuff. This is my honest opinion of myself. People have called me all sorts of nasty things about myself, and I think they're right. When mother called me down for dinner, I stayed in the bathroom until my cuts dried. Then I ate all my dinner, waited until mother went out to work, then stuck my finger down my throat and vomited it all up. I went to sleep only to wake up in the morning stuck in the nightmare I called life.

I heard there's a party that someone's throwing in a couple of weeks. Anyone can go, so I might go. I went to school this morning, and this afternoon, I was due for my detention. I walked in, long pants, a jacket with a hood. I just slouched in my seat while Miss Swan went through paperwork. It was quite boring. Then the world around me started to spin. I tried to stand up to go outside, but I couldn't stand normally, let alone walk straight. I walked straight into the door frame, and I was out like a light.

I woke up in the nurse's office, with Miss Swan next to me. "Regina, are you okay?" I smiled weakly. I love when she says my name. It's so soft and sweet. Wait. What? I nodded my head. I took it easy getting up, but I got up. Mother called to see if I was alright getting home and I told her yeah. I didn't really want her to pick me up. She's a bitch and I hate her. She poisoned my father to make his death look accidental, then tried to claim his insurance money, but he was smart and left it all to me.

"Regina, what were those marks on your arms?" Miss Swan asked me. I shook my head and rushed home. Like hell I'm telling my Creative Writing teacher that I used to cut really bad and then it got better, but for some unknown reason it's getting worse again. Ruby called to check on me. I told her I was fine, but I'm clearly not. How long will it last before I attempt suicide again? How much more can my mind take on? Will it be a month? A week? A year?