GIRLS - rilaya

of girls and distance

chapter three
riley

~

I sit at the window.

It's been two days that Maya hasn't climbed through. I sit here, hearing noises of random people and traffic jams but not of the footsteps and voice of my best friend.

"Riley?"

I look up at the door.

"Hey, Lucas," I attempt to say with a smile, but I can't.

"Where's Maya?" he asks, walking in to sit next to me.

I sigh. "I don't know. She hasn't come here in two days."

Just as the words leave my mouth, the window cracks open. Maya pops her head in. "Oh. Hey Huckleberry," she turns to face me, "I can come back later if you want."

I yank her arm and pull her fully in. I turn to face Lucas and smile sweetly. "Lucas, get out."

"Yes ma'am," he says with a nod, climbing out the window.

I turn to face Maya. "Maya Penelope Hart I haven't seen you here in two days."

"I know. I'm sorry, Riles. I just... everything seems so different now. I needed some time to think."

"Think about what? I thought we made a deal - no one matters but you and me," I say, grabbing her hand.

She stares at it before answering. "Yeah, but Riley, we're letting so many other people into our lives. It's getting harder and harder to think that."

"No one will come between us unless one of us lets them. And I know I'm not."

She looks down.

"Are you?" My voice is almost not there.

"No," she answers. "And I don't want you to think I'm jealous or anything, cause that's what Farkle thought. I'm not jealous. I'm just taking some time to get used to all these changes."

I frown. "I don't get why you keep saying that. Nothing is changing! It's still you and me."

"And Lucas."

"Is this what this is about? Lucas? Maya, you were the one who sent him to talk to me."

"I know! I just- I don't know, it's just so different," she stammers.

"I'm confused." I say.

She finally scoots in closer and rests her head on my shoulder. I've always loved the way we fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. "Me too," she sighs.

~

"Lucas, stop!" I laugh, as he chases me around the empty gym with his water bottle aimed towards me.

"Riles, you know I'm as strong snd fast as a horse-"

"And you don't know how, you just are," I stop running and place my hand on my lip to mimic him. He looks at me and smirks.

"Oh, you're so going down," is the last thing he says before I get lifted up on his shoulder and gently placed onto one of the gymnastics mats.

I lay down, catching my breath as he settles in right next to me.

"How are things with Maya?" he asks, after a pause.

"Not any better, but not any worse, either. I'm not sure we've ever been like this before, besides that one time I borrowed her leather jacket without asking her and she'd thought she lost it."

He lets out a chuckle. "You sure you guys aren't fighting, then? It's just... some time apart?"

I nod right away. "Of course. You know, sometimes being best friends with someone is only good for so long. Maybe this break is what we need." Lie, lie, lie. That's what my brain is telling me as the words leave my mouth.

"Are you sure?" he asks, sitting upright now. I pull myself up too.

"Positive." I stare into his eyes. His eyes will never compare to hers. She has galaxies and oceans and I get lost in them. But when I find myself staring into his, all I see is my reflection.

"Riley - and I know this might sound invasive, but - maybe it's more than that. I mean, you guys are... the best best friends I have ever seen. It's really unlike the both of you to go on a 'break' for two days."

For some reason, I snap. "Okay, Lucas, you're right. You are being invasive."

Maybe it's because I know that. Because I know that ever since he's been a bigger part of my life Maya has been distancing herself from me. But Lucas is right - best friends don't do that. Does she like him too? Is that why she's not with me anymore? Or am I doing something wrong? Maybe I'm the one who's doing something wrong.

I turn to face Lucas. "Are you happy?"

"Of course I am. Are you?"

~

I get home by myself without stopping by Topanga's, the way it's been for the past few days. Nobody's home except Mom, who sits on the couch. When the door shuts, she looks up.

"Hey, Riley! You okay?"

I nod. "I haven't talked to my best friend in days. I'm not even happy with my own boyfriend. My group of friends is growing apart and it's because of me. Everything is completely different now and-"

Although I don't mean to, I start to cry.

"Oh, Riley, come here," Mom says as I sit down next to her, my head in her shoulder.

"I'm just so confused," I whisper.

"I know, sweetie," she answers, "but I don't have the answer to this one. It's all up to you."

I wipe my eyes and sniffle. "I hate it when that happens."

She laughs and pulls me into a tight hug. "What's going on in Rileytown?" She taps on my head.

"I don't know, Mom."

"Riley. Are you happy?"

"I'm the happiest when I'm with Maya. And she's not here."

"Right. What about Lucas?"

I sigh. "I'm getting tired of talking about him."

"You would rather be talking about Maya? You'd rather be talking to Maya?"

"Yes," I answer, quicker than I expected.

"Uh huh," she says. "And what's the most important thing in a relationship?"

"Conversation," I say. Plain and simple. Then I realize it.

"When you're with Maya, you like to talk about Maya. When you're with Lucas, you like to talk about Maya. What do you think the world's trying to tell you, Riley?"

I look at her. She smiles down at me. "You did know the answer after all."

"I know everything," she replies. I smile and wrap my arms around her.