The Impossibility of Loving Another You --ON HOLD--

Chapter 1: The End

Chapter 1: The End

You know how it hurts when the one you love breaks you're heart? Well, I'm experiencing that right now.

"I'm sorry Amiel, you know I loved you, right?" There it goes, loved. Past tense.

"You know what, Jayce? I loved you. I still do. I don't understand this. I don't understand you. I thought everything was going perfect, I thought that you felt the same way. I thought that we really do belong together. I'm guessing these thoughts are really just thoughts. But you know? Even if these are just thoughts, I honestly believed in everything. You know perfectly well how I feel for you. No.. How could you....?" I said to him as I felt my heart tightening and my vision getting blurry.

No. I can't cry in front of him. I have to show him I'm strong enough. I have to make him feel that he's letting go of someone who'll come once in his lifetime. I want to make him see who he's letting go of. Who I really am. I want to show him that he'll regret..

Who am I kidding? I just don't want him to let go. I don't. I can feel my hands shaking, I want to break down right here and now. Saying those words to him, took everything I had in me. Well, why wouldn't those words take everything I had in me? It's all the sincerity of the feelings I honestly felt for him.

He looked at me with those eyes that held pity and.. what is that? Regret? If it is, you can still have me back, just say the words!

"I'm sorry.." he murmured.

Crushing my heart, a tear dripped down my face and I immediately wiped it with the back of my hand.

"I don't understand.. I really don't understand!! You said you love me!! You said we'd be together forever! Was it all a lie to you?! What am I to you? Why...." Oh no, I'm breaking down.. As I said those words, I kept on hitting his chest with the futile attempt to hurt him like the way he has hurt me.

He let me hit his chest again and again until he held my wrists making me stop. He opened his mouth, as if to say something, but immediately closed it again. He looked directly at me with those hazel eyes that make me weak in the knees, those eyes that seem to see every part of me that I try to hide. I was in a trance, as I always was when I stare in those captivating eyes of his.

"Amiel," he began, snapping me out of the trance he has put me into. "From the beginning, I was already captivated by you, your smile that melts every part of my heart, the way your eyes seem like they can see right through me. Those misty grey eyes that looks so innocent and pure.. Those eyes, that smile.. You.. Almost changed me.."

His words melt my heart. He means them. Then why?

"Wh--"

I was about to ask him but he suddenly placed his finger on my lips making me stop what I was about to say and sending tingles through my body.

"Wait. Let me speak first. You know from the start that I'm a jerk, a playboy and that I have an ego the size of an elephant. You know I'm not good enough. You know I'm stupid."

I chuckled at his words, I remember calling him all those things on our first fight. Does he remember those little details?

More importantly,

"I don't think you're all those, and you know it." I said aloud, yeah, he can be a egotistical jerk sometimes, but I know its not true. Like it's all a façade he unconsciously puts up to put that invisible wall between him and everyone else.

"I don't know why you still say that despite seeing what you saw. Why?! You saw me kissing another girl and you act like it's okay! Heck! I was stupid enough to cheat on a great girl like you, to not have feelings for you anymore. Please don't forgive me.. I don't deserve it. You should be mad at me. You should hate me. You shouldn't be looking at me with those eyes of yours. You shouldn't give me a chance anymore. I don't love you anymore.. So.. Why..."

And now.. he finally said it.

Those words I've been dreading to hear.

----**----

Tell me if I should actually continue this story! Message me or something :)

Sorry for such a short chapter, I'm not really good with this whole chapter by chapter thing so tell me if you want to read the next one soon. :D

So Jayce was actually apologizing for that! Waddya think 'bout it? :)) Sorry for making things end when it just started, well, they say "Endings are new beginnings." =)))

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~and most of all, ENJOY! :)

~Rhy

xoxo