Hold Me Close And Don't Let Go

The Pain

Joe's POV:

I sat in the bar, anger driving me insane. How could she ditch me like this? She is being fooled again and will get her heart broken. I looked around for Caspar but he was nowhere to be found.

I opened my phone and saw a text from him.

Im going to Cecelia's for the night. See ya tomorrow.

I didn't think of replying. I couldn't think of anything except for Y/N.

I got out of the club and headed home.

I came back to an empty apartment. No Y/N. Although I don't know if I even expected her to be there. I was hoping she would be.

I waited for an hour or so. It was past midnight and still no sign of Y/N. I began worrying. Is she with Mark? What are they doing? I hope he's not hurting her.

Unpleasing thoughts ran through my head. I took my phone and called Y/N. No answer. I called her again but still no answer. The third time she rejected my call. I was enraged beyond words. Now she's ignoring me?

I hardened my grip around the phone and then threw it at the wall. I screamed and screamed again. I screamed until I could no longer do it. I didn't know why I was so angry. I spent the whole night thinking about Y/N and why I was so intolerant of the idea of her dating Mark.

Y/N's POV:

As we entered Mark's hotel, he pinned me to the wall and started making out with me. I tried to respond as eagerly but failed. But he didn't seem to notice. He just went on. It was past midnight as I lay in his bed naked. He was sleeping peacefully. I was thinking about Joe and what I had said to him when suddenly my phone started vibrating.

I looked at the caller ID. It was Joe. I didn't want to talk to him. Not after what happened. I wouldn't be able to talk to him without starting to cry. He called again and I could feel myself tearing up. The third time I switched my phone off.

I went to the bathroom and cried my eyes out. What was happening to me? Why did I argue with Joe? Why was it that I don't feel the same with Mark as I did with Joe? The thing with Joe was just a mistake but then why was I thinking about it and him so much? Was I with Mark just to forget about Joe?

*the next day*

I woke up to an empty bed. Mark was gone. I switched my phone on. There was a text from Mark.

I had to go out for some work, I will be back by evening and then we can get some lunch or stay at the hotel for some fun. I choose the latter tho ;) Love you.

I sighed. I checked my work emails and my schedule. I had a meeting in a few hours. I looked down at myself. I was a hot mess. My makeup stained all over my face and my clothes were all wrinkly and dirty. I couldn't wear this to a meeting.

That meant I had to go back to Joe's.

As I was in the taxi on the way to Joe's, I couldn't help but feel a little relieved at the thought of seeing Joe.

I entered the apartment and the strong smell of alcohol took over. The apartment was dark and there was no sign of anyone. I headed over to the living room to see Joe sitting on the floor, wasted, but still drinking.

I walked over to him. He looked up at me. His then warm blue eyes now stone cold and red like he hadn't had any sleep or had been crying. He kept staring at me. I couldn't read his expression. He was in the same clothes that he had on the previous night.

I walked over to him slowly.

When I came here, I thought of just avoiding Joe and changing into fresh clothes and heading out. But looking at Joe, I felt like crying. I better not be the reason he is in this state. If he is harmed, I won't be able to forgive myself.

I sat down beside him.

I looked at him and I could feel my eyes welling up with tears.

Without thinking, I hugged him. I held him tight not wanting to let go. He was startled at first but hugged me as tight. I couldn't hold my tears back. I started crying and saying, "I am really sorry Joe, I shouldn't have said those things. I am really sorry for ignoring your calls. I am really sorry."

I could feel him smile a little.

"It's okay Y/N. I was really worried you wouldn't talk to me. I am sorry too," He said, his voice strained.

We kept hugging. I felt all of the memories from that night flooding back in. His eyes on me the whole time we made love. The warmth and the comfort of hugging him and laying my head on his chest and drifting to sleep.

I buried my head into his neck and sighed deeply.

But then I realized I was in Joe's arms, breathing in his smell, reminiscing that night. This wasn't right, but why did it feel so right? "I am with Mark so it doesn't matter anymore," I thought to myself but was unconvinced yet. It took every bit of me to break the hug and push away the memories.

I stood up and adjusted my dress.

"Umm, I have a meeting in an hour or so. So I am going to get changed and leave," I said, clearing my throat and trying to not think about the hug.

"Oh okay," Joe said, "I will see you later then?"

"Actually, I have a thing planned with Mark..." I said and instantly regretted saying it.

Joe's hands formed a fist and I swear I could see them trembling in rage.

But he just looked at me and with a smile said, "Okay then."

Then he went off to his room.

As I watched him go, I felt disappointment inside me. I don't know why but I expected him to stop me. It didn't make sense but neither did anything else.

Joe's POV:

I shut the door as I entered my room and breathed deeply and tried to vent out my anger. But it didn't help. She was going out with Mark again? I couldn't believe this. I had decided that I didn't want to interfere in her "love life" with Mark anymore because that would only lead to us fighting.

I desperately wanted Y/N to see that Mark will cheat on him again. But if I talked about this to Y/N she would get angry again. So I avoided the topic.

I tried to distract myself by trying to work but my head ached so much that I couldn't do anything but lie down on my bed.

My head and eyes both hurt and I was tired because of not sleeping all night. But I didn't want to sleep.

But as I lay in my bed I could feel myself developing a fever. My body starting aching at even the slightest touch and my temperature starting rising. I somehow managed to take my clothes off because they made me feel suffocated. I was sweating profusely and eventually blacked out.

Author's Note: Update in a few days, thank you for reading! :)