Hold Me Close And Don't Let Go

The Hesitation

Joe's POV:

I had drifted to sleep and woke up the next morning. I got out of bed and put on some clothes.

Last night felt like a dream. Y/N taking care of me, then me realizing that I loved her and then us gazing at each other intently. I really wasn't sure if it was a dream or not. Suddenly I felt sick. What if it was all a dream? I couldn't bear the idea of all of that being just a figment of my imagination.

I opened my door and to the living room. It was empty. I searched the whole apartment but Y/N as nowhere to be found. Lastly, I went up to her room. I knocked gently a couple of times getting no response. Then I could hear feet shuffling and then the door opened.

And there she was.

She had just woken up. Her hair was in a messy bun and she was in a loose baby pink crop top and a pair of Disney pajamas. She was still a child at heart. She was scratching her head and stifled a yawn as she looked up at me. I couldn't help but not keep looking at her.

She was so perfect. Everything about her was perfect.

As soon as she looked at me, her body language changed. She became stiff and nervous. I didn't understand why though. After some time of us stupidly staring at each other, she spoke up.

"How did u sleep? Are you okay now?" she asked, concern evident on her face.

And then I knew – all my worries were useless. Last night really happened.

"It was good and yeah I am completely fine," I said smiling.

"Okay then," she said relieved. "Do you want me to make you something?"

"No it's okay. I just wanted to talk about yesterday..." I said trailing off and trying to read her expression.

She tensed up immediately as if she was guilty of something.

"Yeah what about it?" she asked hesitantly.

I didn't know what to say really. What should I talk to her about? The Mark thing or the "I am in love with you' thing? The latter was not a good choice at least not then. So I mentally prepared myself to talk about the Mark thing, being careful with my words so that I didn't hurt her in any way.

"Can we sit and talk? I will make us breakfast," I said.

"No Joe! You don't have to make anything. You are still recovering," she said slightly angry.

"No it's oka-"

But I was cut off by her saying, "Shut up Joe and let's sit in the kitchen."

She started walking past me to the kitchen and I couldn't help but smile at this protective side of hers.

She took out two bowls and looked through some cupboards for the cereal.

"It's in the bottom left one," I said.

"Oh thanks," she said and then bent down to open the cupboard.

It took all of my might to not stare at her behind.

As she came back with the box of cereal she had a smirk on her face as if she knew I struggled not to look at her.

She made us two bowls of cereal and sat down across me on the kitchen counter.

"Umm so what did you wanna talk about?" she asked rather nervously.

"It's about Mark," I said trying my best to sound as chill as I could be.

"Okay?" she said questioningly and I was surprised at her reaction. I thought she would be nervous but she was just plain curious. That meant it was not Mark that she was nervous talking about. Then what was it?