The Book (Dragon Age II)

Varric saw what he should not have seen--and wrote a book about it. A humourous and romantic adventure between Fenris and Anders.

Chapter One: First Draft

"It's the one story I'll never publish." Varric eyed the book with distaste. It was a slim volume, bound in cheap red leather that was already cracking along the spine. He had only gotten it bound a few weeks ago, but the abuse it had taken since showed clearly in the stained cover, the frayed pages and the tears along the side from where someone had attempted to rend it asunder with his bare hands.

At least the mage hadn't gotten a hold of it, he thought. Otherwise, the book would be nothing more than a tiny pile of ash.

"And why is that?" Isabela asked. She leaned on her elbows and stared down at the innocuous little thing.

"Well, you know I like to write about our adventures..."

"Uh-huh..."

"I mean, it's more fun that way. More realistic. Even though sometimes I have to make things a little less... weird."

"Especially for Merrill," Isabela agreed.

"So, well, one night I, well, I saw something."

"As you often do."

"And then I wrote it down."

"Again, which you often do." Isabela nodded along, her ebony hair sliding on her shoulders and her earrings shimmering in the dwarf's candlelight.

"And the people I wrote about didn't... appreciate it." He sighed and drank.

"Oo, now I'm intrigued." The pirate reached out, but Varric snatched the book away. "Oh, come on, you can't give it an introduction like that and then not let me read it!"

"That's not how I want to end my life, Rivaini."

"You can at least tell me the title!"

Varric thought about it. He shouldn't, really, that would just give too much away, but he was vulnerable to Isabela's pout. She was his most adoring fan, his most staunch supporter, especially for the pirate-centric series, 'There's Something About Captain Marian.'

He muttered the title.

"What was that?" the pirate asked, leaning closer and displaying more of her heaving assets.

Varric cleared his throat. "It's 'Fugitive From Your Flames.'"

Isabela stared. Then she started to laugh. "This is about a bad rash, isn't it?" she asked. "You know, I think I've had that one!" Enthusiastically, the pirate knocked back the last of her drink and then slammed the tankard on the table. She leaned closer, smiling widely. "You know, I've always wanted... can I... Can I touch your chest hair?"

Varric sighed. "It always comes to this, doesn't it? I'm not just an exceptionally manly chest, Rivaini. I have feelings. I have a mind."

They stared at each other. Then they started laughing and Isabela tackled the dwarf to take advantage of his manly chest.

**

Later, Isabela sat at the bar, hunched over the purloined book, and started to read the battered pages.

First, she was confused.

Then she snickered.

Then she gasped.

Then she pressed her face to the pages to get that much closer to the words and ignore the badgering of a certain irritating Champion.

Much later, she traipsed unsteadily to the Lowtown Alienage and knocked on Merrill's door.