Sajje :
I Sat Indian Style In The Middle Of My Bed Staring At The Wall . I Could Feel The Tears Just Itching To Fall . As I Took A Deep Breath I Held My Head Back In Hopes Of Preventing Myself From Crying . Against My Will The Acid Drops Flowed From My Eyes . I Covered My Mouth As I Cried Trying My Best Not To Make Too Much Noise .
"Fuck" , I Whispered To Myself . I Fell Back Onto The Soft Pillows . I Could Feel My Eyes Getting Puffy . Once The Tears Stopped I Held Up My Phone To See The Message Once More .
Sajje I'm Sorry To Inform You That Courtland Has Been In A Bad Car Wreck And He Has Passed .
I Threw My Phone Across The Room In Anger . All I Could Think About Was The Argument We'd Had Just Hours Ago . How Stupid It Was . The Tears Burned Yet I Couldn't Stop Them From Falling .
I Laid On My Back Letting The Pain Drip From My Eyes Onto My Face , Staining My Pillows . I Quickly Sat Up && Wiped My Face As I Heard My Door Open .
"Sajje ?"
.....
I Couldn't Speak . Nothing Was Left To Say . I Only Stared At My Little Brother . I Stared At Him Feeling Sorry Knowing That One Day He'd Lose Someone Special && Feel The Pain I Feel Now .
"Sajje Can I Come In ?"
I Simply Nodded . I Watched As He Shut My Door && Made His Way Over To My Bed . He Sat Beside Me Saying Nothing At All . He Just Sat There Staring Into The Distance .
After A Few Minutes I Laid Back Onto My Pillows . Sammy Laid Down Resting His Head On My Chest . I Knew He Was Listening To My Heart Like He Always Does , I Wondered If He Could Heart A Difference Now That I'd Just Lost My Best Friend.
He Wrapped His Arms Around Me . "Sajje It's Gonna Be Okay . I Love You ." I Hugged Him Tightly As I Cried Once More . He Didn't Have A Clue Of How Terrible I Felt Inside , But He Had Hope .
"I Love You More Than Anything Sammy , Please Never Forget That ."
After A Long While He Said Softly " I Won't " Soon After I Heard His Soft Snores . I Pulled Some Covers Over Him And Let Him Rest .
I Put On Some Shoes && Grabbed A Jacket . On My Way Out The Door I Looked At My Mother Sleeping Peacefully On The Couch Without A Single Worry .
I Shut The Door Quietly As I Walked Out . The Day Seemed So Pretty . I Began Walking Away From Our Apartment Complex , Nowhere In Particular But I'd Gotten Pretty Far .
I Found Myself Walking Across A Bridge . I Stood Admiring The Beautiful Scenery . Everything Seemed Perfect , Everything Except Me .
I'd Somehow Convinced Myself To Sit On The Edge . I Closed My Eyes . I Listened To The Breeze && The Rumbling Of The Cars Both Behind && Beneath Me .
Courtland Was All I Could Think About . My Best Friend Since As Far As I Could Remember . Gone . Suddenly It Began To Rain . The Rain Forced More Sadness .
I Opened My Eyes As I Scooted Closer To The Edge . I Couldn't Take The Pain Anymore I Was Ready To Jump . But Something . Something Made Me Look To My Right .
Sammy Stood In The Rain , Staring At Me . "Sajje .... " I Shook My Head , This Couldn't Be Real . As I Looked Back Down At The Cars Beneath Me I Took A Few Deep Breaths . Turning Back To Sammy I Mouthed 'I Love You' Then Took A Leap .
