Mr. Female - ON HOLD -

Mr. Female: Chapter - Muffin Man, Frankenstein Hair and Letters, Oh My!

Mr. Female: Chapter 1 - Muffin Man, Frankenstein Hair and Letters, Oh My!

*UNEDITED*

You know you're a failure in life when you're locked out of your own apartment. Did I know where the key was at least? Uh, yeah, I'm not that stupid. Well, I think I know where it is... Probably.

I lean against the wall across from the apartment door as I try and think of a solution for my dilemma. I could always break down the door... But then I'd have to pay for a knew one. Maybe I could break into another apartment and then demand they give me cookies, at least then I could think on a full stomach. Naw, don't want to appear crazy to them quite yet. Mrs. Peters might have a key to my apartment... But mom said she was visiting her grandchildren for the week.

Sighing I finally decide to go for a walk, clearing my mind might do me some good. Instead of taking the elevator like I had before, I hopped down the stairs, sliding down the railing for a bit too until I practically made myself a pancake on the wall. Thank god there's no such thing as stair-speeding tickets.

The cool late summer air instantly envelops my body as I step out of the building. I sigh as I shove my hands in my coat's pockets, feeling the air already start to nip at the exposed skin. Stars are scattered around in the sky like freckles on a face, sparkling like, well, stars.

Deciding to just wander down the street I let the street lights lead the way, not sure where exactly I was headed. Maybe I'll reach Narnia, although I'd need a wardrobe for that. Perhaps the Night Bus will come by and I can get to Platform 9 3/4, then it's just a hop skip and a jump before I'm at Hogwarts.

Too distracted in my slightly abnormal thoughts, I didn't notice the shadow trailing behind me. It wasn't until I turned a corner for the third time that I finally noticed it. Now I don't know about you, but this seriously feels like one of those stereotypical horror films. I wonder if I should at least scream, give the dude the satisfaction of knowing he at least got some sort of reaction.

After debating for a good three or four minutes I finally decide it's best to just remain unresponsive, pretend like I didn't notice him. Although with his height, it's like saying; "What? No, I didn't notice I had come to school naked. Oopsies." Well, perhaps not that obvious, but you get what I mean.

Spotting a little bench I sit down, cringing when the obviously rotting wood squeaks in protest.

Note to self; lay off the brownies.

The guy from earlier sits down on the other end of the bench, taking out a book from his pocket and begins to read. Great, now I feel stupid. What am I supposed to do? My knee begins to bounce, my hands tapping a random beat on them. I peak at the guy from my peripheral vision and see his head turn in my direction slightly.

"Have you ever met the muffin man?"

The guy blinks at me, probably trying to decide whether or not to take me to some mental hospital.

"Uh no," he says, his voice deep, like... Something deep, "I can't say I have. Have you?"

I beam at him, shaking my head. "Nope. I think he'd kinda hate me considering I've eaten a bunch of his kids."

His eyes widen at this, their rare grey colour surprising me. "You've eaten a fictional character's kids?"

Realizing how that made me sound like an extreme cannibal, and quite cuckoo, I revise my earlier statement. "No, I mean, I'm not Kronos or anything. Nor do I really like the taste of blood. I mean I've eaten enough muffins to feed a whole army plus all of Africa."