I feel myself replace my happiness with darkness. I don't like it, but then I do. I find the darkness comforting. It fills me up with so much nothing, that I fell something. I'm afraid to let the happiness come in. Or push the darkness out. Because then I'll be empty. Because there is so much darkness. I have relied to long on this darkness. I need to let it go, but I don't know how. Sadness is something I can rely on. Happiness is there for a second then disappears. But sadness stays. And if your lucky you'll get depressed and it will be with you forever.
I guess I'm lucky in that category.
