It is common knowledge that every little girl wants to be a princess. They sit and watch all the Disney movies about the girl finding her prince. All of them believing that there was such a thing as true love. I was one of them. My family wasn't exactly rich, but we weren't poor either. At that time, being a six year old girl, I did not care. All I cared about was being a princess, like Ariel from the Little Mermaid or Belle from Beauty and the Beast. I was the only child in our family, and I was happy that way.
My backyard was my kingdom, even though it was small. I would bring out my stuffed animals, dolls and place them in neat rows facing me, standing on the porch. I would then start to wave, and then make royal decrees for all the people in my kingdom. I loved every moment of it. Then I would get my mother and father to join me for a tea party, though my father was a bit hesitant, he always put on a smile and sip at his tea.
At the age of eight I got my first pet, a cat, that I named whiskers. She was a short haired tabby with gray and black fur. I loved her, I would dress her up. Though I doubt she enjoyed it as much as I did, but she was a good cat, she put up with me.
At the age of ten the saddest day happened on the month of April. A year before my mother fell ill with, at that time didn't understand the concept of it, cancer of the breasts. She was going with my father to the hospital two or three days a week, and when she came home she looked worse than when she left. But I always told her she was beautiful, drew her pictures, watched movies with her, made her laugh on the days she was down. I thought and truly believed she would get better. I had to, she was my mother, and she couldn't leave me. Then the day in April happened, she laid in her bed, as I sat down beside her and held her hand. I would always remember the look she gave me, a smile that meant goodbye.
“Mommy, you can't leave me... please.” my voice begged, father was behind me, trying to hold himself together, but I knew he was breaking.
“I will always...” my mother began taking short breathes, “Be there for you, and I will always love you.” I let a tear slip down my cheek, which she wiped away with her thumb. The next few minutes before she passed on were silent, we knew it was coming. I felt my father's hand rest on my shoulder as my mother took her last breathe of life. Her eyes closed slowly, as life escaped from her. I touched her shoulder and gave her a little shake,
“Mommy... please... wake up...” my voice was cracking, as I waited, but of course she never stirred. I got up from where I sat and ran to my room, sobbing. I slammed the door behind me and landed on the bed as I took the pillow and put it to my face and screamed as loud as I could. I kept crying into my pillow, I don't remember how long it was, but when I got up and looked around my room, I glared at my Disney VHS. It was on that day that I took the VHS and threw them across the room, making sure every single one broke. My father, who probably heard the loud noises, came rushing into my room to see VHS all of the floor. He grabbed the last one in my hand, the Little Mermaid, and pulled me into a hug.
“I know angel.” he said rubbing my back, “I'm going to miss her too.” I started to cry into my father's shoulder, as he picked me up in his arms and sat on the bed with me on his lap. It was also that day I knew that dreams and wishes did not come true, and that everything I knew from Disney was a lie. It was also the day I stopped dressing up as a princess, stopped having tea parties. I didn't want to be a princess, not anymore, not ever again.
